The greatest piece of fanfic in the world has to be "Everybody Loves Raymond's Wife". I have never read it, but the title itself is so hilariously evocative that actually reading it would be anticlimax.
When it rains I like to doo wah diddy diddy dum diddy doo.
Yeah, someone suggested I join ASKfm, so I did. Now people ask me silly questions all day.
Is scotch a country?
Dying means a lot to me. I would definitely give it up.
Wow, you must rally be bored this morning. This question was at least three times longer than it needed to be.
Listen, if you want to have sex, just ask.
That all depends on where you put the cherry.
Neither, I am most impressive when I am naked.
I remember in 1863 working the field out back behind Massa' Cracka K. White's house, when Otis came running up to me all breathless and giggly, shouting "Lincoln done freed the slaves." We decided right them and there to move to L.A. and record.
Ban school, not smartphones
So it's YOU!
I guess it all depends...on whether you're talking about a river or Depends.
People get paid to do this? Really?
Did you mean my nightmare job? I don't have a dream job. My nightmare job is being forced to work children's parties dressed up as Ronald McDonald.
3. CV Grog/Rum
3. CV Grog/Rum
I think people should pay more attention to other people's phones. It will give them something to talk about, while they look.
People actually have favorite viners? I need to get out more.
Politicians. No matter how hard I throw these stones, I keep missing them.
My favorite spot to be kissed is probably Fiji.
Rent myself out as a human airbag.
The guy who throws his wallet away on that dumb insurance commercial. Despite his regret, his impulsive act is the only logical solution to most of the problems of the capitalist mode of production.
This is so weird; I was just expecting someone to ask me this question.
I don't know. I answered this shit question, so it's not zero.