Dr. Andrew

Ask @LSLLoveAdvice

Sort by:



My mom’s brother is married to another man. My uncles are super. The problem is some of my friends. They keep making fun of my uncles. I’m not sure how I’m supposed to handle this. I don’t know why others always have to judge people. I’m in middle school so it’s a pretty hard time anyway.

Yes, middle school is a hard time anyway. Just tell them that you love your uncles and leave it at that. The more you get annoyed by what they say, the longer they will keep doing it.

I just did some research on this guy I met online. I don’t like what I’ve found. I’m not sure how to cut it off. He is not who he says he is. What do others do who are in the same situation? I’m worried I’ve given him too much information about me.

One of the many reasons I caution people about putting too much personal information online is for the exact reason you have stated. All you can do now is just to say that you don’t feel the timing is good for an ongoing relationship. I wouldn’t give any more details than that because that will just keep you engaged in the conversation. Once you have stated your position, don’t respond to any other communication from him, and DON’T keep checking up on him in social media.

I can tell my bf doesn't want to go back to his job anymore. he's a teachers assistant, he loved it but his passion is dead. He's having a hard time finding a new job and I can tell he's stressed but he doesn't talk about it with anyone.

Continue being supportive of him. He is going through a rough time. ask him if he would like you to accompany him to seeing A career counselor.

Related users

I have a particular fetish that no one else seems to share. obviously I could hire a dominatrix, but I want a real relationship! Should I just give up on finding someone who likes my fetish? I honestly feel like I could live a vanilla lifestyle with some time.

People have different sexual desires. The best advice is to keep dating until you find someone who enjoys what you enjoy.

I am a step-father. My wife’s daughter thinks WE should pay for her wedding. I don’t try to be her father, but she’s never accepted me into the family. I don’t feel like I want to contribute since it’s my money too. Am I being foolish?

Your feelings are certainly understandable, but if you withhold anything, it may cause a major rift in the family including with your wife. If it is not a financial burden, just do the right thing, which is to act like the adult. I can certainly understand that you feel taken advantage of, but it's truly not worth the risk of stopping everything.

I don’t want to be alone my senior year in h.s. I would much rather have a “partner” to go through the year instead of dating. This girl feels the same way so we’ve been going together for the summer. It’s fun but I’m worried about what happens after we graduate. We are going to different colleges.

As long as you both understand that the situation is just for your senior year, you will have fun in your senior year. However, being together for that amount of time will bring the two of you very close together. That will make it difficult to break up. Emotions cannot be turned on and off like a light switch.

My auntie is a flat out racist. My gf is a Filipina and just laughs off the comments. I’m worried that she thinks I should say more. I’ve asked her if she wants me to say anything, but she just smiles and says it’s ok. I’m not sure what to do or if she’s just trying not to make waves.

As long as your girlfriend is not offended, take her approach to the situation. Have a conversation with her first to make sure she is serious about not being offended. If you are really uncomfortable, tried being around your aunt less

I recently went to a national conference. Me and this guy hooked up for two nights. I thought it was just going to be for fun but now he wants to be serious and I don’t. I’ve tried the “let’s just be friends” approach but that’s not working. WTF? I would just like to cut him off completely.

You need to have a more serious conversation with him. He obviously does not get the message when you are not very very direct. You don't have to be mean, but you have to be very firm. It is perfectly acceptable to say that you are not interested in a further relationship.

My bf’s dad passed away and almost a year later my mom passed away. My dad and his mom are planning on getting married, which would make us step brother and sister. We were going together first. This creeps some people out. Can you tell me how to explain this, please?

You can explain it exactly as you just asked in your question. You cannot control what people think. As long as you and your family are happy with the situation, it's just fine. Granted it's a little on the odd side, but it will work out just fine

In my culture a woman is supposed to get jewelry gifts from the groom’s family at the time of the engagement/wedding. I’m not a fan but don’t want to be disrespectful. My bf doesn’t care one way or the other but says his side would be insulted if I didn’t accept the gifts. I'd like to decline???

Rather than insult his side of the family, why don't you first graciously accept the gifts? If you choose not to keep them, you can always donate them to your favorite charity. That way everybody wins.

My husband keeps putting off having kids. We’ve been married for 2 years and are pretty financially set. I’m scared that he will keep putting it off but don’t want to get pregnant without both of us agreeing. We never really talked about kids. I don’t know what to do now.

It really sounds like you need professional help. This is something that needs to be thoroughly discussed before bringing new life into the world. There may be something holding your husband back from committing to children, and that needs to be brought to the surface.

I am a male in my mid 30’s. Everyone keeps asking when I’m going to settle down and get married. It gets annoying. What do I say?

Tell them that when you decide to get married, they will be one of the first to know. Just smile. People are often curious why an otherwise successful person would not be married at your age, but it doesn’t mean that marriage is right for you, at least not right now.

This is awkward. My grandparents and this guys grandparents are good friends. I used to play with this girl when we were toddlers at our grandparents’ houses. Now our grandparents are trying to get us together. Both of us agree that we are friends but not right for each other. We don’t want to o

Just tell them how much you appreciate the fact that they are looking out for you and thank them. Let them know that the two of you are still looking. That’s all you need to say.

Me and this guy met in a rehab. We really hit it off. Here’s what I’m worried about. Lots of people say that when two people meet in a rehab the only thing they have in common is they are both druggies. That’s not something to build a relationship on. Are they right?

When people are in a rehab, they are very vulnerable. They share things they may never have shared before, which is why people feel so close. As long as you are both cautious and have done the necessary work on yourselves, you can proceed with caution. The mistake that many make is to focus on the relationship rather than focusing on sobriety. It’s easy to get distracted and revert back to old behaviors.

Me and this guy met online about 2 months ago. We found out we don’t live that far apart. I know he’s real because I know people who know him. I’m really worried it won’t work out even though we seem to get along. Is there a way to know before I get involved?

There is no way to know for sure until you start seeing each other in person. Let me offer this observation. A “real” relationship is far more important than an online relationship. It’s called human interaction. I’m not saying not to have online friends, but if you are talking about a true romantic relationship, that’s only in person. It’s worth the risk.

My bf started taking the “little blue pill”. He says he can last longer.. I really haven’t noticed any difference. He’s only 24. Isn’t it dangerous for him to do that? I thought it’s only for guys with ED.

Yes, it’s dangerous. I assure you he is not getting them from a doctor. He is putting his life at risk. See if you can convince him to go to a doctor and then go with him. Somehow he feels inadequate. Assure him that you are perfectly satisfied.

I am single and in my 50’s. I’ve never been in a relationship but I would like to be now. It’s not that I am asexual. I just never had a relationship as a priority. How do I avoid jumping into a relationship just to not be lonely? I don’t want to make a mistake.

As I’ve mentioned, you are no different than the younger groups. Ask yourself what you really want in a relationship. That is how you will avoid making mistakes. Our app, Love Shopping List, will empower you to make better decisions and fine tune your "picker". Here is the download link: https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/love-shopping-list/id536099778?mt=8

My friend told me that you are releasing a new version of Love Shopping List. Could you tell me when?

Yes, we are working on Love Shopping List v.4 which will be a major upgrade and re-write from the ground up. We are designing based on user needs and requests. We cannot disclose any details yet but it's going to be easier to use, more intuitive, with advanced features. Stay tuned. Our product development timeline is just beginning!

I really like this girl. We are both seniors in hs. As far as I know, she isn’t going with anybody. How do I approach this? Should I actually ask her out?

Why not try asking her to a "casual" event. Try to find out what she is interested in. You could do a sporting event, a museum, or something like that. Always be on time and always be a gentleman.

Our teenage daughter (17) has been dating this guy for about 4 months. Without snooping, we have become aware of some very unpleasant information about him. We have always trusted her. Do we tell her what we know?

As a parent you certainly have a responsibility to advise your child. You can begin by explaining that you did not look for the information but it was given to you. Then, explain what you know. Express your confidence in her and try to let her make a decision or ask you questions.

My bf’s mother is becoming a nightmare. She is trying to control everything about our wedding. I’m almost ready to call it off. My bf really doesn’t get involved. What should I do?

You AND your bf need to sit down with her. Explain that you "appreciate" her help and would like to give her some things to make choices about. Then you can say that the two of you will be making the choices of the other things. This way she gets some of the control. HOWEVER, beware that this may be a pattern well into your marriage and you may have to draw firmer lines. that's why it's sometimes called MONSTER-IN-LAW. Ernie K-Doe even had a song about it- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EN5eJf5h_kLSLLoveAdvice’s Video 137915730233 6EN5eJf5h_kLSLLoveAdvice’s Video 137915730233 6EN5eJf5h_k

How do you know if u r bisexual or just experimenting?

Experimenting is relatively short lived, while true bisexuality is a lifestyle. Just give it some time, and you will know.

My gf’s brother is a football hero at our school. I don’t play. He’s always putting me down. She says to just ignore him but I am having trouble with that. Because it’s her brother, we come across lots of people who know all of us and they go along with his “jokes”. She says there’s nothing to do

Hero or not, he's a bully. You can always gently confront him in front of the others when he does a put down. Here's a great line- "So, does it make you feel like a real man to put me down in front of your friends? If you really need to do that, go ahead, and I'll understand." It should shut him up quickly.

When is it ok to step in on a sibling’s relationship. My sis is involved with a real loser but I don’t think she realizes it. I keep getting info about him that is not good. I’m worried about her because she doesn’t seem to see what everyone else does.

Without judging, just ask her to sit down with you. Explain that you are not interested int telling her what to do, but you though she should have some important information. Tell her you will respect and support whatever decision she makes. That way she is less likely to become defensive.


Language: English