it's not suka yang macam having a crush or apa tau. it just a suka gitu gitu je. i used to like someone dekat askfm ni but over the time, i realised that he's not into me. he treated me the same way he treated everyone when i thought he has a soft spot for me lol. silly me ik. he is one of the ppl that brings out the best in me. he loves to draw, sketch and doodle. his art work is chef kiss. i used to tell him everything. literally everything. even he didn't look at my texts, but still. I've tried a lot of times. I thought maybe he will read it later. i told him a lot of things, my probs, my days, my sick like literally everything for freaking 2 years without him reading it. it hurts so bad. im hoping that he was there when im at my lowest but he's not. im hoping that he was there when im worried about my mom surgery but he's not. i expected too much from him. he never read it and i think he won't read it. funny right, i never met him so i shouldn't tell him about my probs or my secrets, but he's one of the kindest soul I've ever known, one of the good listeners, he made me trust him. sometimes i share things that shouldn't even be shared to someone that i never met irl to him. look how much trust I put in him. I miss him so bad. it's been years, I should've forget him. but I can't. it's been years i still care about him. "How's his life right now?", "is he doing good?", "did he forget me already", "is he got married already" etc. I care a lot about him. but ik he didn't care about me anymore :)

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