Hahahaha. I'd cook them up a trip to the awesome Mexican joint in the next town. My treat, of course.
You're going to make me choose?! Oh, the agony. But I guess gun-to-my-head:
1. Karen Bee
2. Shinobu Mail
3. Tsubasa Cat
4. Hitagi End
5. Hitagi Crab
6. Suruga Devil
7. Nadeko Medusa
8. Yotsugi Doll
9. Mayoi Snail
10. Nadeko Snake
11+: everything else
Generally in order of song quality + visual strength, I suppose.
Man, you are asking the wrong person here. I actually find the typical MMO mantra of "Complete a series of nearly identical repetitive tasks over and over to receive incremental rewards" to be fairly relaxing. I spent days, if not weeks, of my life flying around in WoW picking flowers while chatting with people on Vent. And those are some of my fondest gaming memories.
I feel like "Love Plus" is kind of the default answer here, with a corollary joke answer of "Fire Emblem Fates".
But I actually most want to recommend the Galaxy Angel games for being one-part Waifu Simulator, one-part Space Opera, and one-part real-time strategy game. These games also have the benefit of being non-PC releases, so they're actually not H-games. If that's not enough, they also feature both Miyuki Sawashiro and Yukari Tamura as Best Girls.
Group Song: Start:Dash
Subunit Song: Cutie Panther
Off-unit song: After School Navigators
Duo Song: Beat in Angel (for obvious reasons)
Solo Song - Anone Ganbare Rin Ver. or Daring!!
Bonus non-μ's Song - Shocking Party
Bees, I guess.
Spiders don't bother me. I don't really get clowns. I like dogs. I don't really have the luxury of a needle phobia for health reasons.
But bees are goddamn terrifying. They're poisonous, they can fly, they're loud, and always come in numbers somewhere between "metric f*ckton" and "Swirling black could of pain and death".
As rarely as is feasibly possible.
Is this some kind of trick question?
If Madoka can do it, so can I
Fool. I am a Lord of the Sith. I sit upon the Dark Council, answerable only to the Emperor himself. The power of the Dark Side bends to my will, and soon the galaxy shall follow. I am hatred unleashed. I am passion unchained. I am nightmares made real. I am violence incarnate.