Ask @ThatsSoCliche:

Heather Jerk-a-miller
Latest answers

What do you love the smell of? 

Napalm in the morning

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What are the three things that you cannot live without?

Water, Air, Food

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What do you order at Starbucks?

Get the smelling salts ready.....

I don't order anything from Starbucks.

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What is the Universe made of?

Some science-y stuff.

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Who is your biggest mentor?

I'm not sure, I never tried to measure them.

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At what age do you consider someone old?

It's not someone's age that makes them old, it's their lack of understanding slang that makes them old.

I haven't understood a word anyone has said to me in the past 5 years.

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How do you prefer to travel?

When I'm in a new city, I like to walk the streets, explore, look at the architecture, smell the air. I really like to dig in.

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How do you like your coffee

I like my coffee the same way I like my men:

Cold, bitter, and full of booze

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What's your favorite pickup line?

So, I noticed you're into breathing. I like breathing too! Wanna get some coffee and talk about how great breathing is?

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Do you give money to beggars in the street?



Do I give PEOPLE money in the streets.

The homeless people in my area exist, but are not as visible as they are in other areas. If I did see someone asking for money, I would.

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What’s wrong with the world?

We are the world. If it sucks, it's because we do.

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How long does it take to really 'know' someone?

Time has nothing to do with it. Someone's willingness to be known does.

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On a scale from 1 to 10 how weird are you?

I don't believe I am weird at all

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When you’ll be 90 years old, what will matter most to you?

How well I loved, and how I affected those around me, which I hope will be positively.

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What makes you special?

Nothing. I'm just like every other jerk you know.

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How old were you when you started playing video games?

Can you believe we used to blow into our game cartridges? How silly is that?

Dammit I'm old......

I was 8, or 9. I inherited a younger uncles old Nintendo with a few games; Ikari Warriors, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and Friday the 13th.

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Where were you 3 hours ago?

God mom, you're so nosy!

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Do you prefer to talk or to listen?


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What is your zodiac sign?

I'm a Vagittarius

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What is under your bed?

Monsters, probably. And dust bunnies.

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Do you believe that each individual on Earth has a soulmate?


The idea of a soulmate is rather depressing when you think about it. Aside from that, I think it's very dangerous to look outside of yourself to feel whole. You're already a whole person, there is no missing or better half.

People should complement your lives, not complete them.

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What is the best thing to do on a first date?

Star gazing, going on a picnic, having a water gun battle, reading poetry aloud, renting a little row boat and going out on the lake, making food together...

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Are you a city or a nature person?

Nature. I like to think about how everything is connected and dependent on one another for survival.

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What are your favorite subjects to talk about?

Life, death, reincarnation.... lots of things. People and gossip are my least favorite subjects.

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What is the meaning of your name?

Heather: a low-growing plant of northern areas that has small leaves and tiny white or purplish-pink flowers.

It totally fits me! That's soooo me.

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About Heather Jerk-a-miller:

I'm just a tiny lady with overactive sweat glands.