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Why do women choose men who mistreat them rather than a man who puts her as his top priority?

All women don't.
Also, just because he's interested and makes her a priority doesn't make him a good match. But admittedly, he's better than someone who is disinterested. At least there's less drama.
Until a certain point, everyone likes what they can't have. There's some ego involved there. The smart folks grow out of that and want someone they find interesting who is also obviously interested.
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Liked by: Unchinked Armor C Parker

Dating (1 mo) a PhD student who is in his last year. Asked him where he sees himself in 5 years. He said he lives 1 day at a time because we aren't promised tomorrow so he doesn't invest in making goals. I understand the live in the moment idea but is it a red flag that he doesn't have goals?

Not necessarily.
The 5 year Q stumps most people. It's a loathed interview question for a reason. 5 years is a LONG time. A lot changes.

Have u heard that men don't like to date extremely pretty women b/c they're high maintenance or intimidating? I know men are visual and assumed they all loved beautiful women but I heard that they may date beautiful women but don't "wife" them. Have u ever heard this and/or is there truth to this?

i've heard it.
i'm still yet to meet a man who anyone would actually want who doesn't enjoy a pretty woman on his arm. don't base your perceptions of men on the rantings of the most insecure among them.

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Anonymous

Thank you for your condolences. Am I to retain him as a friend after this incident? & I haven't grieved & this happened last month. However I did seek out therapy because his reaction made me feel that I shouldn't grieve.

You don't cut friends for one screw up like this. If he's been a good friend, address the issue when you're in a better place. But do know he's not a crisis-friend.
There are all sorts of friendships. It's rare to find an all-purpose friend.
You should grieve. You lost someone close to you. Grieving is normal and healthy.
And I'm VERY GLAD to hear you found a therapist. Taking care of your mental health is and important as york it physical.

I hate giving blowjobs but my man loves it. From experience, Do you recommend giving blowjobs to keep a man?

Do it bc you want to, not out of fear of losing someone or obligation. Half the pleasure in it is a partner who is willing and enthusiastic about it.
Funny thing: the right man who treats you the way you want to be treated and pleasures you the right way, will inspire you to want to do that and a whole lot more you might have not considered or enjoyed prior.
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Liked by: Michelle L. Brock Honor J.

I recently lost a cousin to murder & went to my best guy friend to calm my nerves because I live 3 hours away from where this occurred. I was in shock so I talking about everything else but he knew what happened. He tells me he needs me to leave after an hour & goes to his boys'. I'm hurt, advice?

I'm sorry for your loss.
He was really insensitive. It may have been too much for him to handle.
You do need to talk it out. I get that. Is there someone else you can speak to?
Focus in you getting what you need right now. Address his insensitivity when you are in a better place. He's shown you that he is not a crisis friend. Remember this.

Cut a guy off I really had feelings for b/c he was unapologetically disrespectful. Haven't spoken to him since. I'm not over him & am still hurt over incident. How can I get closure w/o speaking to him? Don't wanna Re-open the door of communication since I know I deserve better.

Write it out. Put it in an email and send it to yourself. Get a lifer coach or a therapist who will listen to you and pour there.
And you're smart for realizing that contacting him is a bad idea if he wasn't treating you right.
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Liked by: Unchinked Armor Jennifer-Rose

friends with a guy but want more. Mutual attraction but I put him in the friend zone. I think I am just scared to put myself on the line. Also don't want to look emotional or wishy washy pouring out my soul.

If you like him, speak up. There's no way to get around not being vulnerable if you want to build a relationship.

Ok,dating dude & i see him 6 out of 7 days a week BUT if his cell goes off most nights and he doesnt call the house before bed like he used to.Asked him if he's really single & he said yes but i rumors stated otherwise. Thoughts?

You see him 6/7 days of the week and you wonder if he has a gf?
Something's up with turning the cell off and I can't guess as to what other than being burnt out by 6/7 days. That's a lot. Doesn't sound like there's another woman if he's putting in that much time, but something may be up.

Together 5 yrs & married 6 mos. He sometimes complains that cooking & cleaning is not done to his liking and compares me to mom and women in his fam. They do not have full-time jobs and do not place importance on professional accomplishments. I am opposite. He says he likes that but then still makes

Tell him to give pay for a cleaning lady since your cleaning is not sufficient and pick up extra duties around the house so you have more free time to cook. If he balks ask him if he would prefer you don't work and he can handle the bills. Add that despite the loss of your income, you expect to be kept in the manner you are accustomed. He should have a come to Jesus moment.
Remind him that you are not his mom or a relatives

Dude really hurt me this past year but I'm still in love with him.In September i asked him to let me go,stop coming to my rescue or stop responding if i called cause i always ended up hurt. He didnt want to initially but he finally did...want him back now,Im still crazy about him. What should I do?

Leave him alone. This is not healthy for you.

Is wearing and modeling sexy lingerie a requirement in a relationship? It's not my thing but I know men love it.

Ehh. Some like it. Some prefer their jersey or their button down or nothing at all depends on the man.
If your man is into it, give it a try. If he likes it, it won't be on long.

Not sure if this is your forte but can you suggest an appropriate secret santa gift to get your boss?

Wine or champagne. No one is ever mad at this.

First, kudos on your tv show..I understand that women are the $ drivers for the dating and relationship advice market,but who and where do most men receive their advice? Talking to "their boys", is like the blind leading the blind.Trust me they need work just like us Is there a male counterpart of u

i asked guys about this. they listen to married dads, pastor, older friend who has a wife/life they admire and president obama.
my closest male equiv for guys is probably Enitan Bereola or Rob Hill Sr. There's also Jozen Cummings, but he's more woman focused. All are homies, especially EB and Jozi.
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Liked by: Michelle L. Brock Courtney Brown

1. Girlfriend and this guy I was seeing would message each other on FB, she never met him in person. At first I didn't thing anything of it until he started asking her to meet up for drinks. She didn't tell me and I feel she should have. ( He wasn't my BF). I'm I wrong for holding a grudge?

let go of the grudge FOR YOU. if you don't **** with her anymore, so be it. but let it go for your peace of mind.
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Liked by: Aj

OP:Cheated, I know you often advises one to let a SO know when the RShip is over. but just this once would it be ok to just leave without explaining,to make him hurt. He's in the living room watching tv. I'm packing I'm staying with a coworker tonight he will take me to the airport in the morning.

nope. not even here.
you want to hurt him, living well is the best revenge. he'll be hurt enough if you tell him you're out and don't contact him again.

My fiancé is in a wedding in a few months. I'm feeling awkward bc I don't know anyone and will b sitting alone at the wedding and reception since he's at head table. Can I stay home? Or just suck it up for a few hrs? Tips on getting over the awkwardness

suck it up. they'll likely put you at the table with the SOs of other people in the wedding. Fi-fi will check on your periodically during wedding.
you MUST go.
make chatter with others at the table. "how do you know the bride/groom?" is a decent icebreaker.

OP:Cheated, I get that money is tight right now. But he has food, toys,shampoo ,bed etc for the dog. He finds money for new Jordans, the Samsung notelll, Has the new Xbox on layaway and I don't even bat an eye. I often feel he never cares what I need. I made arrangements to go back to GA in the morn

Welp. His actions say a lot don't they?? And they match his words. On all fronts, he's showing and telling you that he's not ready to be a father.
I was hoping he was a good guy who made a mistake. But it seems he has a pattern of ignoring your needs. That's unfortunate.
Do what is best for you.
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Liked by: Kartarajai Singh Unchinked Armor MJade

Had an abortion Monday. I wanted the baby, boyfriend did not. He says financially he's not where he wants to be. Today he walks in with a puppy to cheer me up. I fell apart I cried a river still am. This seems like a slap in the face to me. Pets are a lot of work too. I feel cheated :(

Anybody in your situation would feel the same way.
He didn't mean the puppy as a consolation prize, unless he's a grade A @$$hole. Somehow I don't think he is. He just doesn't get the depth of what it feels like to you.
When you pull yourself together, explain it to him why this was the wrong move.
You feel cheated because you really wanted your baby and you didn't want to have the abortion. There's no replacing a kid. And him not getting it just makes it all the worse.
Going forward, please use condoms/take BC so you don't end up here again. I don't want that for you. I hope you don't want it for you either.
*ehugs*
1

Was briefly involved with a guy last year who has a gf. We only kissed on 3 occasions, never had sex or went that far. He always and still complains about his gf. Now just friends, why does he feel he has the right to give me dating advice when he's been in an unhappy relationship for over a year?

No clue. You have to ask him that.

Would u recommend a guy b straightforward as we'll with a woman he no longer wants to date? She's not bad just not going to work for me

Yes. She may not like it, but she'll respect not being strung along.

How do you break it off w/a great guy who hasn't done anything wrong & who is really feeling you? I'm torn up about potentially hurting him but don't want to lead him on/drag it out knowing he's developing feelings.

Lara Brown
"i think you're great, but i'm just not interested in a relationship with you. i want to be honest and not lead you on."
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Liked by: Lara Brown

met a guy. probably going to marry him. Problem is he drinks and is atheist and my parents are Christian straight edge. I don't care b/c i drink too (they don't know) he's ok with our difference in religion as am I and we agreed to raise the kids Christian. they might hate him, idk. Help!

they don't have to marry him. you do. if you're fine with him, that's all that really matters. everyone just
needs to be respectful, no matter how they feel.

Hi Belle! I'm 19 and I have feelings for an ex that keep resurfacing. I've told him once before that I still have feelings for him thinking that would make me feel better. Should I tell him again or just let time heal that wound?

move on. you've told him before how you felt and he didn't step up. let that go.
don't waste your pretty
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Liked by: MC.

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