@captainslackbladder9

Captain Slackbladder

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A family member texted and said they would be here 10 days for a vacation and I wasn’t even asked if it was okay. How do I stop it from happening again?

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Text them back and say those dates are inconvenient.
Ask them to give you a set amount of notice before letting you know they’ll be visiting, so you can advise them whether or not the dates are convenient.
Tricky - you could use the ‘oh dear, that’s unfortunate I’ll be away staying with my friend in Timbuktoo’ or you could say ‘oh no! I’m so sorry but cousin Felix beat you to it’ or you could say ‘oh I’m sorry that’s so inconvenient, will you mind sleeping on the floor, the bed’s broken and I’ve not had the time or the money to replace it
Politely explain that you don't want visits sprung on you, and you'd prefer advance discussion so appropriate plans can be made. Really not difficult.

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