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SAAD ALI AWAN

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What is Something that took you so long to realise? 🌚

BariyahKhan’s Profile PhotoBARIYAH KHAN DILAZAK
Sometimes standing up for yourself makes you feel like the people you are standing up to will judge or dislike you for 'confronting' them. You might feel insecure about yourself, want people to like you, or not have much confidence in your own values or opinions. However, standing up for yourself actually shows assertiveness, which many people regard as an honourable trait in a person. If they were reasonable people, they would actually respect you for the choice you made to stand up to them. Standing up to your peers, friends, co-workers, family, you name it - it's all pretty difficult. For whatever reason that you feel it is difficult to stand up for yourself, let me tell you: it is not shameful or rude to do so and, on the contrary, it is, in fact, brave and admirable, and shows you have confidence in yourself.

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Random thoughts?🌟

laiba_s12’s Profile PhotoLaiba
You are mostly surrounded by toxic people, friends, coworkers and family. Try to find some better environment. Surround yourself with loving friends and family. Lower your expectations on people and realize that people aren't always kind. We all go through some stuff and that some people can be different from days to days. Aim for kindness and authenticity in people and not shared interest, social status or anything. Just look for genuine kindness. :)
Liked by: Laiba

Something worth reading 💫

I dare you to walk your own path. Wherever that leads. Whatever they say. I dare you to work on yourself for 6 months. I dare you to shut out the world. I dare you give up everything that is keeping you from your dream. I dare you to shut out ALL the distractions and work on YOU. Work on YOUR DREAM! You’re well and truly capable of living at a higher level… If you DO or you DON’T – that’s up to YOU. In this world you only have to earn the respect of one person… that person is YOU. You determine the level you demand of yourself. It’s time to DEMAND MORE! It’s time to prove once and for all, WHO. YOU ARE. WHO you will become! and what you will never settle for again. Raise your standards. RISE UP to a higher level… and let NO ONE question YOUR INTEGRITY again.

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Hiiii lil sad soul. How’re you doing ?

Angry. Angry that no matter what I do it's never enough. That I need to push myself to greater heights out of my comfort zone just to please others. That my life doesn't feel like my own but it fills me with a temporary flame.
Lost. Lost within myself, within the world. Searching for the person and place I am meant to be. Confused as to what is the right or wrong decision, but knowing the decision is irrelevant.
Voiceless. Surrounded by people who care still makes me feel alone and burdened by piped up emotions. Knowing that no matter how many times I explain it people will never know what I exactly mean. That I just need to nod my head and pretend they understand.
Hopeful. Waking up with effort, but still looking for the morning light. Knowing that if I keep going, maybe, just maybe I can put myself fully back together. It won't be easy, but I'm going to see it.

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How to stop or slow sexual desire?

It's natural to have sexual desires; it's part of who you are and as part of being a human being. It's perfectly healthy to sexually gratify yourself. If something's bothering you, try taking a moment to address what of thoughts you've been having, and when you are most overwhelmed by your urges. First you must develop a social life. Staying at home alone is a bad idea. Go for a walk make friends, start hobbies or sports where you are not alone. Secondly you must make it difficult for yourself to do anything you dont want. Turn off the wi-fi at home unless you need it for something important. Take the t.v and computer/laptop out of your room and put it in a public space. Search the internet and try to find the many support groups and organizations that exist that adress this issue.

What do you fear?

soneelashaheen’s Profile Photo100blues26
I feel a bit empty. I dont have alot of friends who I can communicate with my feelings since there have been alot of changes in my life. I feel empty or like I’m not experiencing everything the way I should like I’m trapped in my own body. Often, I find myself getting so sad and depressed for a reason I can’t figure out and when I just want to cry it away, I hardly can. Everyday, I wake up around 2, brush my teeth, eat something,sit in my room for hours, and then finally go to bed at like 5am.When people ask me if I want to do something, I get excited but I know that when the day comes, im not going to want to go anymore. I tell myself constantly that I don’t need to feel like this, I shouldn’t feel like this, I just want to be happy. And the thing is, I was happy for a little bit but then everything got all sad again. I’m tired of people asking why I look so depressed or act the way I do because I have to pretend that I’m not and avoid explaining it because I fear what they think. I just want to be genuinely happy.

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Share something! Which spokes out your heart ❤️

FizaNadeem12’s Profile Photoツفضہ ندیم اختر
Really lost. I want to experience everything and I know nothing about myself. How could I put trust into life when I don’t know the limits of my own? I don't really know what to say I hate to tell it to people because it sounds like I'm feeling sorry for myself, makes me seem weak. I go through these waves where I am ok and then I'm really really not ok. I want to live, but I can't stand being here anymore. Every time I see a hateful comment from one person to another it just confirms my idea that there is no hope. Everyone I am around sucks every ounce of energy I have, but no one ever gives back. They say they understand but they haven't even heard what i have been saying. I am a strong person. I am intelligent. I am capable of great things but I am so scared of being let down any more by any one or any kind of rejection that I avoid trying. I try to overcome things. I try to be thankful for what I have. I try to just do what I am suppose to do, but there is that pain in my chest that will not go away. The ache that I am insignificant and the guilt I feel when I start doing something just for me is crippling me. I do not know how to make things better without making things worse.

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Your writings are very beautiful mashallah.. yes Idk you personally but I know ur an amazing guy and ur different from the rest.. you have a way with words and it's amazing how you can describe what your feeling inside, Saad you're a beautiful soul and I wish u all the happiness in the world💓💓😂

Thank you so much 🥺❤️

Are you healed ?

I’m never going to let her go, the image of her face is carved into every inch of my memory, so you’ll have to drag me all the way to Hell before I do. Drive and passion are often mistaken for dreams and procrastination, and mistakes are always made by those forged from innocence. I tell myself that I don’t need you, that I’m okay; I tell myself that moving on should be easy. The past is a parasitic little bastard though, isn’t it? Clings to one’s memory and refuses to let go. No, it doesn’t cling to one’s memories, as one’s memories are formed from the past, and thus are the past. I wish I could forget it all. All of the pain, the anger, the depression, the anxiety, the desire, the greed, the desperation, the chaos, the restlessness, the stress, the pressure, the hate, and the love. I want to eradicate it all from my memory for good, all it does is cause me pain. Everything that I am, everything that I am haunts my every waking step. The night terrors remind me every night, they tell me I deserve to suffer, and the pressure to grow up has slowly eroded at my imagination and creative spark. I believe them. But ignore everything you’ve just read, after all, they’re merely the ramblings of a man on the verge of insanity. One trying desperately to claw his way back to the past, even though a part of him knows that it’s impossible. That’s the definition of insanity, isn’t it? Trying over and over, even though the result always comes back the same? I guess I really am going mad, crawling back to the past at every opportunity. Crawling back to my memories of her, of them, of back then. To a time when things were so much simpler.

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Wow, gotten so speechless with your ease of words you have poured out in every answer. Not just relatable but makes me feel more secured that maybe I ain't alone in this battle of loneliness and despair. Your words have given me a healing power and I can't be thankful to you more than enough :")

Vans_totally’s Profile PhotoJoanne Abraham
There's a little girl.
She is a bit needy. Not for attention - she hates attention. Except from a select few. From them she longs foracknowledgement, to feel worthy, to beloved... unconditionally. She is invisible - ignored, rejected. Left wanting, always fending for herself. She offers herself happily. The good girl, helping, caring. She loves. She makes excuses for it. She consoles them. She wonders what she did wrong. She's tired of getting her hopes up,sitting alone, wondering. Why she's not enough. Why she's not worth the energy or a word. She's sad and anxious all the time. Except whenshe gets that taste of worthiness - when they need something. Until she's inconvenient again. I keep telling her not to be needy. That she doesn't need them. She doesn't need to care about them. She doesn't need to keep putting herself out there like that. :’)

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Speak your heart out! 💫

Everything starts with a broken memory for me, something that I’ve tried to bury deep down, and thus, can no longer clearly remember. All that I am able to remember is the familiar swelling of the pain within my heart, consuming it entirely and utterly. That, and there’s a familiar face, one smiling in bliss. It is my own face, if my recollection is correct, but am I able to recall anything correctly anymore?
I’ve been feeling this way for far too long, continuing to appear young whilst my mind grows older. It’s been more than a decade now, hasn’t it? That’s quite a long time to carry such a hefty burden, I imagine. Of course, but I have no intentions of relieving myself of it. I intend to carry all of the darkness contained within me until the day of my final death. This will strengthen me, will it not? The pain? The past? Right, the past, and more broken memories. Splintered memories are all that follow me from my origin point, as if my history is nothing more than a shattered mirror.

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Let it all out 🥀

It’s been almost 2 years. I want so much to feel ok. To feel like there’s a reason to get up every day. when you’ve given everything you had, not as an obsession, but because you really truly believed in someone, it’s not until you’re left behind that you realise how much of your identity was destroyed.
before we met, I had it all. Money, joy, freedom of choice, friends. everything is gone. And it’s so hard to even articulate how I am experiencing this darkness. A profound agonising, heavy despair like I could NEVER have imagined was possible. On an intellectual level I can cognitively acknowledge, perhaps eventually accept this loss. But my heart doesn’t get it. Or accept it. And it’s smashed in a billion pieces. I guess I have to keep going. Not because I have the motivation. Only because the only other alternative is to sit and wait for deaths embrace. So I do what I suppose I have to every day, in the ever dying hope that enough time will have passed and enough life re-lived for this nightmare to release me. I hope that one day, when enough time has passed, that she will have finally been faced with no other option but to do the introspective look at ones self. And maybe then she’ll understand, how much I loved her, and how much of me that was given. it may never happen. But If it does, it will break my heart to see how much remorse and regret she may then have to bare. I truly did do everything that I could. I hope I will matter to someone one day.

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Why are you so scared ?

I am confused by my own emotions. I feel confused, and emotionally tired. yet also extremely hopeful for the future, which makes me anxious about being severely disappointed again. Like I’m walking and walking towards nothing. Like I’ve finally reached the end of the path exhausted and I’ve reached nowhere. Empty and pointless. I’ve walked so far and fought for so long.

Heartbroken?

Confused. Unsure of my steps, unsafe. Self-protective, feelings of values and things I know are true being attacked but striving to trust people I love. Sense of playing into certain perceptions about me because of the nature of what's happening. Sense of not being able to show my true self because of stifling images and perceptions about me, feeling of intense oppression and loss of dignity. Spiraling into feelings of being trapped and insanity and doing things that are crazy, want to protect myself. Struggling to be vulnerable out of fear of looking stupid and being used/further abused. Anger and huge sense of injustice and humiliation preventing me from showing compassion in my heart. Vicious cycle, unsure where to turn. Sense of being deeply misunderstood. Sense of losing vital human privacy and dignity. Sense of being forced to participate in a game made to alleviate the resentment of others' to fix their own feelings while leaving me with permanent and un-fixable damage.

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Are you okay ?

There is so much happiness in this world but I always feel like I am on the outside of it all. I just watch while everybody lives their life. I am just a spectator. II feel like I am fine and then it all comes crashing down. It always has. I just want to be free. I jist want to breathe. I just want to be able to live.

Random thoughts? ✍🏼

Sometimes, relationships don't work out. Sometimes you even pour all you have into loving a person and they seem to not want that love back. If you love them and they don't love you back, then they don't deserve you. But there is hope. Someone is out there that appreciates your love. Some people aren't meant for romantic love, and that may or may not be you. If you are, then your person is out there. I promise. If you aren't, then there are still people to love you. Find a family member you're close to or a best friend and pour into them instead. If they're the one, then they'll pour right back into you.

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