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#83: What does failure means to you?

when i read your question, i feel like sharing something.
caution: it's a long post (not so long, but longer than i usually write.)

my final exam is just around the corner, (and the fact that i need to repeat some papers) make me wary. i'm starting to wonder why am i being so concerned-- is it because i’m scared i might fail the exam (again), or lack of preparations, or trying hard not to disappoint my family, or to avoid being ashamed, etcetera. And while asking myself all these, it leads me to another question-- what is, the definite reason of me wanting and aiming for everything. I figured out, it's just all about me and/or other people- human, position, honor. Sadly,… my aim and reasons; transient. i pay attention too much on my ‘horizontal relationship-line’ and the owning of my greed, neglect the real purpose to why i'm here nonetheless. i ‘fail’ to care that everything would be gainful and rich of benefits only if, only if, the sincerity is in the name of Allah, not in the name of myself, or other people, or whatnot.

yesterday my naqib shared the 20th verse from The Iron (chapter 57/quran), and it gives me a huge chill ever since. (check that verse out!) we talked over 2 hours and everything he said, quoted from quran mostly, just got me in my feelings. quran mentions a lot, even gives us examples, about people who were thought of by others as being winners and were thinking of themselves, however, they were real losers in reality. the story of Qarun for instance; some people wished to have the exact kind of success, assuming that this is the real bliss but in actuality, it's just a fallacy. what is the meaning of being successful, when the day you meet Him, it's actually an empty hand? with that being said, everything is a success, when it's solely for Allah, even if you failed an exam :-p (but it doesn't mean we need to separate the success of the world from the Hereafter! both are important!) (I.e.: i need to start studying with the aim to attain jannah and ustaziatul alam, not only to complete a degree or having a good job. i need to start eating, not only to fill my stomach, but by thinking that without eating, i'd be a weak asset for ummah and not able to attend all the wasilahs tarbiyah perfectly, etc. In simple words, have bigger vision, not only revolve around yourself.)

so to answer this qustion, i choose not to hold the conventional meaning of failure.
failure to me, is when our ‘illah’, isn’t ‘lillah’.

(p/s: not sure if you can understand my handwriting lol but if you are interested to read more about (57:20), tafsir fi zilal, tafsir al munir and khawatir quran are the sources of what my naqib and I've been talking about yesterday.)

(*i'll temporarily stop being on here till August 6th,
sorry if i'm not answering your question(s), i will soon!)

take care folks :-)

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#99: I've recently found snoring can put a strain into a relationship. What would you do if your partner has snoring problem?

there are solutions for snoring so i'd make sure to give her a hand, but not surgical solutions for some reasons. my dad has a serious snoring issue so ig by asking my mom for some tips would be a great help

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What's the best way to make someone feel bad without I look bad?

to inflict any doings on someone with that motive, i prefer to suggest nothing. just be happy and move on with life, then it makes them look bad for either hating on you, or makes them wish they were as happy as you :-P

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#100: Where are you mentally right now?

kinda burned out from some stuff, feeling like a$rgH(,k0%gHplga but that's ok

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What's the best horror movie you ever watched?

i really just want to find a horror movie that can actually scare me. i love 'the hills have eyes (1997 & 2006)', heard they are making a third this year. but that movie is all jump scares.

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What do you personally think about Trump's transgender military ban?

not aware of this until one of my friend talked about it. he's a huge lgbt ally. personally i think when it comes to military, it should be allowed for anyone as long as they pass the expectations of that military's standard of war. it should be based on the physical physic and health of the individual. if they'd be useful and efficient in a combat situation, i see no reason to peter that out. gender, race and ethnicity, should't play a role. that's just my two cents, you don't need to stand behind it

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Nabil, I'm sorry I couldn't stay longer. Goodluck on your exam! I know genius like you could beat the rest. Take care. See you when I see you. /yy

sorry i was attending symposium and there's so much to deal with these past days. i hope didi is getting better, and you, please take care yah. oha thank you for the wishes :-)

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When you see a woman wearing a hijab or covering her head, do you ever imagine what she looks like without it?


that's why my mom always remind me to lower my gaze, because let's be honest, my 'ingenuity' can get in-genuine, sometimes.

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最近(さいきん) .recently. right?

yeah but maybe don't use 最近 for that. use like 今先. it's not wrong but 今先 sounds so much better :-)

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Any specific object or event that reminds you of your mom? Do your relationship with your mother changes as you age? /7/

everything reminds me of my mom. dirty dishes, unwashed clothes, burnt curry,...i especially miss her at those times. but flowers remind me a lot of her because she loves gardening. one time i planted a seed but forgot to water it, i told her and she get mad at me, sending me youtube videos on how to pot a plant. she's cute when she's mad. nope, even if i get married and become a dad, never would the relationship between us change

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Name something you waste.



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Are you good at sewing?

i'll never fit the bill

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#47: What is the best way to end a relationship?

i wish i have some better opinion on this but meh. i believe to be yourself is important, don't sugarcoat thing- say honestly what you think at all times, never lie that you are still in love but also don't lie that you don't care either. you don't have to hurt their feelings, you can simply tell them you are breaking up, and cut off communication cold-turkey. they might hate you for leaving with little explanation, but they will give up hope much sooner than they would if you just strung them along

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How to piss you off?

this is by far the best question

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What's the best thing happened to you today?

memories that ive long held secrets, but today i decided to talk about them..., it's fascinating. words cant adequately describe them :-)

and oh, he's a cutie innit

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Aku dengar bunyi Ko-yi-e-snap? Apa benda tu? Ke aku silap dengar? Haha

apa tu? tak, aku cakap かわいいですね (kawaidesu ne) haha :-D

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Have you met anyone from Or wish to meet?

never met any but i used to skype @conorves and @gospelx quite frequent back then, especially conor because we play games together (still do). yeah would love to meet few of them i secretly admire :-P

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#45: What is the secret formula to everlasting happiness?

be grateful of everything, may it be good or bad

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HOW can your japanese pronunciation be so on point kyaaaa thought TAICHI MASHIMA IS TALKING TO ME *__*

i need to google who's taichi mashima

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Do you think challenges in your studies become greater compared to your young age? Does having a higher IQ necessary to become a top student? Any tips on how to excel in studies? /4/

when I was in primary & secondary school, it's easy to be on top of the class with very minimal studying, until i was 18-19 y/o, that was when it all changed. but being a high school student in malaysia, i've learned that all you need is reading and revising :-P

when you get into higher education (i.e bachelor) there is no other way than to allot a huge chunk of your time into these assignments (researching, writing) in order to get good grades. just intelligence, is not enough to help you finish writing a 4000 word essay or research 100-pages of information. getting to the top of the class is not just based on your tests and exams. in addition to those tests you have to do lots of projects, research etc., that takes your time and determination.

it's very probable that you are a naturally quick learner. just start to challenge yourself every now and then to give yourself a sense of accomplishment by putting time and effort in a certain hobby or assignment in school. another thing that i've always tell myself if i procrastinate: remember that even though fighting your laziness and procrastination (by working hard) is difficult to do, they (the un-finished work due to your laziness and procrastination) are going to eventually come back at you and make your life even more difficult. of course, a "little" procrastination is always healthy, just not too much haha.

i listen very closely in lecture and then fill in any spaces with textbook/slides reading. everyone is different so if you're more of a standard student, notes may be the way to go. don't memorize things but try to enjoy learning. the way i enjoy learning these days-- i imagine i'm in a lecture and have the professor's voice in my head. anything i don't understand i research until i thoroughly get it. often i just sit there looking out the window because i'm picturing it all and picking it apart to the finest details. sometimes i write explanations up as paragraphs to my friends, which helps them too if they're learning the same material. it can take me like three times as long as it should do to go through a single set of notes, but at least i know i understand it then. sometimes i explain the material to a wall just talking out loud and of course helping others understand, because you help yourself doing that, plus the social bonus of it :-)

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Do you get emotionally attached to people too easily? How not to? /9/

not really, but even worse, im emotionally attached to my set of gunpla. how not to? ha that's why i always wanted to be vrabe, vidar, bael, etc., so there's no feeling attached to anything because,... mecha

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Do you tend to avoid answering sensitive question? Or it doesn't matter as long as you can uphold your opinion? /3/

i selectively pick what to answer :-)

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I know nothing about economy, is it okay to not answer your question?

it's totally fine, i'd appreciate hearing your thoughts anyway 😃

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