Ask @journalforjared:

Yes.. and that still stands very much true πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

Thank you.
I'm going to head back out with the others.
Enjoy the time in and around the ocean and the islands.
Say hi to the pigs if you are back where you were before. I remember that, the pig place, but I can no longer see pictures of your life.
If the time comes that you have a few minutes and you give me words, I will look forward to that.

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The wifi is better thankfully (: and that’s how I want it to be. I want you to feel my love and not have to question if it’s there or not.

I shouldn't question if your love is there or not, (but you know I do.. it's my flaw.. one of many)
I didn't expect you until June. I set my mind to it. It wasn't a good thing, how I set my mind, so I went back and read something that was one of the "meltiest heart thing" you said to me. And I wanted to let you see it, as a reminder.
"beth, you are my soulmate. for my entire life, i will know that you are my other half. what we have is something that can only happen once. with one person" - August 10 2017
I look at the date and realize where we were both at back then.. who we were with.. yet you felt this enough to say it, enough for me to write it down, and put it somewhere where I could see it.
(( Do you see how important your words are to me, when it is all have. They mean everything to me. ))

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I go noghtu no w... I love you πŸ’‹πŸ’œ I mids uo tooo, gllbkghtygv kieey 😘

I only came on just now to write something you said to me last year, one of your quotes from my wall.
This was unexpected, seeing this from you. I feel.. odd. Like I don't have to be as brave as I was trying to be.

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What ?? That’s not what I was expecting...

I said on Monday that I knew you were leaving soon, and that I thought we wouldn't talk for awhile.. this was your response. But it's true, isn't it. When you leave and have no ability to talk to me, then I go without you for however long you're gone. I'm not sure what you were expecting.

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Goodmorning... I apologize for last night. I hope you have a nice day..

I'm fine this morning. I think I expected too much. I was going with my feelings and then realized it was better to have you happy and with friends. I knew we were both tired.
sometimes when I get those feelings I think it's best to act on them or they'll disappear. that's probably silly. either way.... have a nice day too (I don't like using nice. it's so prosaic.)

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to you and my friends. I have a bunch of those little books β€œbits & pieces” that my parents gave me that I will look at later. They usually help. I’m much happier now knowing we’re better. I like talking to you. You’re home.

you have great parents. I'm not sure I've ever read those books. but anytime you can read something positive, it's helpful. what was the test you took last night? I'm curious? Are you now labeling yourself as what it told you you were?
Yes. when we are good, things seems better for both of us. You've said that for a long time. It makes me wonder why we ever let us get "not good" if our mutual happiness hinges so much of when or if we're good. Makes simple sense, doesn't it?
I enjoy talking to you too. Wunna make a habit out of it :)
I'm home. Do you mean I make you that comfortable? I took it that way, not that I was literally "home". But I am.
I'm going to guess you're back on the boat and asleep already. Another time.
I won't be as demanding of your time. I'm busy now too. Maybe it will make you miss me a little more.

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So as you know I’ve been a little stressed lately with my future and it really clouds my head. Yesterday I had to keep saying to myself all day β€œjust be happy... just be happy... just be happy...” and then I talked to Andy about it and he told me some quotes that helped. I’m much better now thanks

yes, I know how your mind is. when you get something in there that bothers you or makes you struggle, you will do what you can to clear you head. I'm happy to hear you are doing that. you are happy. I always see you that way. it's why I get very concerned for you when you aren't. I hope I can add to your happiness and not bring you down. when and if I become more sad and not a good thing, when I'm the stress or burden, I will leave.

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I love you πŸ’‹πŸ’œ I forget you’re not in school anymore so I’d love to hear about what your life is now like.. (:

It's different. I'll give you a synopsis of how boring it is one day soon :)
I wondered how you made it up to visit Erick the other day when you said you were on watch. I had it in my head that Ft. Lauderdale was over 30 minutes north and if it's worth the trip. Then I figured you spending time with someone you are close to, someone who you connected with so well, who shares similar interests, was worth you driving 2 hours a day to see.
My computer is slow and words aren't spelling right. I'm not going to last long.
so my main point I want to get across is , it's worth anything for you to be around people who make you laugh and smile again. to be with people you call friends.

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I hope you’re having a nice day... boss is on board till lunch I think. I miss you. (((I’m missing you a lot recently)))

My days are good. I think positive thoughts when things get muddled in my head. I push aside the sad/negative things. I look forward to naps, working out and food. ( maybe even talking to you )
I wonder why you miss me more? I'm here enough. But I'll take it.

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I’m on my way to Lauderdale again to see Erick, his brother and Jake (: it costs too much though... drying out the bank :/

so this is why you're in an uber. I'll read more later. have a fun night. I'm glad you're with good friends. You need them (( way more than you need me ))

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I wish I could help you buy a new one ):

I know you've offered before but I would never take anything from you. I'll make enough money to get a good used one. If it dies before I can afford it then.. well.. we won't visit like we used to. but you're leaving soon anyway, so.. I kinda expected us to have a few weeks of no communication

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I’m still awake... found something really interesting and can’t stop reading it... but I have not forgotten to come back for you πŸ’œ

you're reading ?!! that makes me so happy smiley
wait, is it like something on line or a real book. like one with pages that you turn??
you can visit me later

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kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy

i'll make them last.. the kisses
I woke up after sleepying an hour
im hungry now
I think I dropped it too many times, mostly when I fall asleep with it still on and wake up with it on the floor.
im scared... I don't want to lose the way I talk to you. but i'll figure something out. gonna go find food.

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Mmhmmmm.... kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy

but you didn't come back and give me words :(
my computer is dying.. it takes forever to turn on and off now and makes weird sounds. if I lose it, I lose the ability to easily talk to you. its almost like losing you....

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Yeah huh!! I need more confidence lately..

i'll give it anytime you need it baby.
don't go lookin for it from some other girl who'll give you a whole loottta reasons to boost your confidence.. least not that I need to know aobut..mmkk?
we can visit tom orrow or wed. when uour time is freer

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kissy kissy kissy kissy kissy πŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸ’‹ sleep tight and sweet dreams baby girl.... yes of course I will πŸ’œ goonighty.... te amo con todo mi corazΓ³n 😘

hmmm
that might be enough. maybe :)
mmkk im goonna sleepy before I fall off bed now.
you gave me goosebumpies saying Spanish 😘

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And yes, that makes sense if you think of me on the right and I think of you on the left πŸ™ˆπŸ˜˜ I will make sure you’re smiley in the morning.. mmkk?

haha mmkk
I got it now
silly silly me
im tired. can we give kissies and go? will you really give me your thoughts I'' read tomorrow??

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I wonder what you think about my physical appearance... if you think of me as being hot or cute or just good looking... what adjectives and verbs do you think I am ?

oh you're in a different class. league even. you have it all jared. great smile, beautiful eyes, perfect hair. extremely handsome. (you grew into your looks, remember what you looked like in 9th grade? you don't look like that anymore, trust me)
and your body is perfect, and you know it. soo... stop fishing for compliments!!
because when I say all this I know other girls look at you and see everything that I see. and desire. soo... yeah.. gonna stop now

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You make me smiley πŸ’‹πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’‹πŸ˜˜πŸ˜˜πŸ˜˜πŸ˜˜πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜ŠπŸ˜ŠπŸ˜ŠπŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸ˜˜πŸ˜˜πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

good
smily jared is a good jared
and I'm not answering that question. it was a good one to keep. to picture us all body touching. holding. we'll have years of that, right? like all kinds of time?
after long days. like today. gentle caresses. softest kisses.. little talking. talk with eyes. see and know just by looking. so often it will turn into deep passion. not enough of each other passion. long. deep. everythings.. mmmmm........

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You’re so cute... and I understand baby. (I picture you on my left πŸ™ˆ)

you better understand.. I hope I got my point across. I mean, he was hot.. like holy crap hot. and you go and pop in my head and make him.. not hot. you make him non existent. you make me .. yours.
and if I'm on your left does that make you on my right? I'm confused thinking now.
please tell me whats on your mind. you can after I sleepy and i'll anser you tomorrow. mmkk?

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