@misphire

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I was watching a sketch comedy show from the late 90s/early 2000s, and they were doing parodies of various celebrities and they did one of Shakira making fun of her accent because she's from Venezuela and English isn't her first lang. Do you think that would be seen as problematic in the present?

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
isn't she from colombia?
regardless, i think it's in poor taste to parody a non-native english speaker for their ability to speak english, and i think a lot of people would feel the same. so yeah, it'd probably cause an uproar on twitter or something.
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Do u think getting along w ur parents is a sign of maturity? My mom and I’s relationship was rather dysfunctional when I was growing up, even in my early 20s. But now I try to understand her. Not excusing her wrongdoings, but atleast we can sit down and talk like 2, civilized adults without arguing

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
i think that's dependent on the person. for me, cutting out my parents was a sign of maturity because they were dragging me down to their level and spending the money i needed for my baby. they weren't going to change for the better, and in regards to my stepfather, i doubt he's even capable of it. cutting them out was the first step for me to acknowledge i deserved better, even if the alternative meant i'd have nothing.
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Can men be Karens? I am a cis man and people have still called me that for some unknown reason

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
i mean, in regards to what the term has been twisted into, sure. "karen" implies an entitled, argumentative person.
but the original meaning of "karen" was very specifically a colloquial term for a white woman who used her perceived fragility as a threat against POC, e.g. exaggerating fear and calling the police upon seeing a group of black kids in a gentrified neighbourhood. so... no. i highly doubt people are using it in that way against you, though. (and acting that way would still make you a douchebag.)
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Should! married people be here? why/why not

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
if you make that leap of logic, you could apply it to any other social media site - which doesn't make sense.
askfm is not a dating site.
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Is it inappropriate to send emojis in a formal email?

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
i guess it depends on the degree of formality? i've had both teachers and employers send emails with emojis. i don't feel comfortable doing it, though.
texts are a bit different, but are still highly dependent on circumstance.
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So on my birthday this dude in like one of my groups was like happy new year. Then I was like thanks he asks me if I'm married I'm like no and then he's like how are you single your pretty. Don't worry I'm not hitting on you then tried to set me up with a guy am I too old to be single I'm 27

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
no, you're not too old to be single. people of all ages are single, whether by choice or circumstance. there's nothing wrong with being single, either; being in a relationship doesn't change your worth.
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What do they mean when they say “you’re not ugly, you’re just poor”

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
it may sound like a superficial statement; however, beauty (especially trends) depends so much on consumerism. makeup costs money. lip fillers cost money. good skincare costs money. surgery costs money. nice clothes cost money. a gym membership costs money. hell, rich people often have assistance via home gyms, top notch personal trainers, and personal chefs, and those things... drumroll please... cost a LOT of money.
for the working class, spending less time at work costs money, but you often need that time to cook more nutritious meals and have extra energy to move your body - a combination that can help improve how you look. you can find ways to make the time, but that can be really tough if you have other obligations or obstacles.
obviously there's natural beauty, but good genes are more common in the rich due to how the stress/trauma of being poor not only impacts the body and makes it more difficult to prevent/fix any health issues, but also your cells - which are the building blocks for the generations to come.
all of this is why i choose not to care too much, lmao. i'm proud of my personality and intellect, and i have had lovers who were/are attracted to me. i don't need much else.

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What phone do you have and how long have you had it? How does it work, is it still in good condition?

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
pixel 5, which i got in... november 2020? i think? it's served me well, and it's still in good condition. the battery is starting to drain a little faster, but i'm honestly impressed it's held up this long regardless of its planned obsolescence. i'll probably upgrade to the pixel 7 (or 6, depending on cost) this year.
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Who was your celeb crush as a kid? Mine was Ashton Kutcher

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
i remember zac efron and joe jonas gave me major heart eyes. i also had a mad crush on ruby rose when she was only known as a VJ for MTV australia.
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Do you believe in destiny?

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
i believe life can be predetermined for us in a way, but not by the universe or a nebulous concept of destiny, but by the circumstances of our birth/upbringing as our brains are wired to follow patterns that we know best. we all have free will, but sometimes it can be difficult to acknowledge we have choices outside of what we're accustomed to and accepted for ourselves.
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Do you use sunscreen religiously? I do, even on cloudy days.

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
no, but i should - i know sunscreen is a vital part of any skincare regimen, and i'm the type to get burnt to a crisp after a few minutes in the sun. i'm just forgetful, lol.
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why a new account?

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
i mostly just want to have all my urls match, lol. this is also a fairly old account, and a lot has changed in my life since i made it, so i'd like to start fresh.
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What popular food do you dislike? Personally I dislike seafood, I only like salmon, if that counts as seafood, but that's it. Can’t ever see sushi or shrimp, it makes me sick

» moving to a new acc! follow me ♡ @eldritchnbi
i'm the same. i eat some varieties of fish but i otherwise steer clear of seafood. i've tried sushi though, and it's okay, it just isn't my first choice.
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Happy New Year! 🥂 What are you looking forward to most in 2023? 🥳

TobbeAsks’s Profile PhotoTobbe
and a happy new year to you!! 🎉
honestly, i don't even know at this point. everything is so precarious - financially speaking - so i'm tentative about getting excited for anything.
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Liked by: Tobbe Captain Obvious

Christmas 2021 vs Christmas 2022: if you were to compare these two, which one has been better? To me last Christmas wins by a flawless victory lol

christmas 2022.
i wasn't living in safe accommodation in 2021, which made a chunk of the holiday season awkward for me. i also didn't get to experience the same joys of christmas: i had to put up someone else's tree; i didn't have a roast lunch/dinner with loved ones; and i received less gifts (though i did get my camera in 2021, and that alone was worth everything).
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Why does society still puts so much pressure on women to get married and have children? If you're a woman and at a certain age, let's say 30, and you don't have children society thinks you're flawed, but if u have children god forbid you're a single mom, because you'll be ostracized.

✨ misogyny✨
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How do I actually convince someone to likeme again? Although they clearly told me they wanted to end things, I don't really want to. They also stated that they did like me genuinely but whenever they would think about us they'd only feel numb.

you can't convince anyone to like you. that's their business, not yours.
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Have you met your doppelgänger?

no, which is funny because my ab*sive ex insisted there was somebody who looked exactly like me living in my town, and would use that person against me in weird ways.
him: "you're cheating on me. i saw you downtown with some guy."
me: *shows definitive proof that i wasn't*
him: "oh, must've been that other girl again. even [best mate] swore it looked just like you."
w. t. f.
i never met or even laid eyes on this person, and i lived in a pretty small town. (btw, he was a prolific liar).
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Are you sober on nye

yeah, i've been sober for more than half a year now. had a bit of alcoholic trifle for christmas, but i didn't get drunk so it barely counts, lol.
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Is there truly a place on this internet where there is no drama? Even in this cats group I’m in there are people calling each other out. Like this is supposed to be just a group where we share pics of our pets but people are totally messy.

unfortunately, as long as there are people, there will be drama. especially in larger groups, where the reason for connection can get lost and more bad faith actors have a part to play. honestly, all we can do is try to moderate our online spaces the best we can - for ourselves and for others.
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Do movies, music etc. from decades past make you feel like life today is a pale imitation of what it must have been like in the past?

not really, no. nostalgia is a psychological phenomenon that causes you to see the past through rose coloured lenses, but it's all subjective; i can watch all the movies and music from the past today, *and* have more civil rights available to me and others.
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What were some of your best moments of 2022?🎆

TobbeAsks’s Profile PhotoTobbe
- moving in with @aclockworkbananna
- graduating
- working on my driving hours (i am thiiiis close to getting my Ps 🥳)
- seeing my bestie from the other side of the country for the first time in almost a decade
- a LOT of successful trauma work via therapy and my own methods
- writing more; even if i didn't finish half of what i started, penning my creative ideas was a massive step forward out of my rut
- cinema experiences: "nope" was a high point

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Liked by: Tobbe Captain Obvious

Were you hoping for a son with autism to compete to brag about to other mums?

i already have an autistic son, as well as 2x brothers, at least one of my sisters, and i'm autistic myself. lmao. if it's a competition, i've certainly won it.
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Is it a red flag when someone only wants to message and talk to you late at night? They keep promising to meet up during normal hours but then something always gets in the way 😒

i don't think that's necessarily a red flag - they could work long hours, or else have a lot of responsibilities. i think it'd absolutely be a red flag if they only messaged/met up with you late at night for *one purpose*, though. (you know the one).
all you can do is ask why it keeps happening, and decide whether or not you'd be willing to maintain that level of energy from this person.
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When you have a cold, do you treat it with medicine or do you let it run its course?

i mean, you can't technically treat a virus with medicine, only the symptoms.
i take medicine as needed - for headaches, trouble sleeping, etc.
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do you think a cold can exacerbate depression or anxiety? i am diagnosed with both, but i manage to keep them under control, but rn im having a cold and i feel more miserable than ever, mentally. physically im okay

that makes total sense. i have chronic illnesses and my depression definitely flares up whenever my fatigue does. i think we can't help but feel low when our bodies are, and the only way to feel better is to rest - especially when resting often leaves you alone with your thoughts.
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This might sound weird, but how do I tell my partner to stop showering me with gifts? Gifts are much appreciated on occasion, I like giving them too, more than receiving them actually. But this kind of attention is unnecessary and makes me feel uncomfortable, I do not want it.

i'd personally approach it with "i appreciate that you show your love for me in this way, but i'd love if we could focus more on (whatever you want to see more of: more dates, experiences, saving money for the future instead of immediate gratification)."
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Is “transexual” a bad word? Someone used it and this trans person corrected them saying it’s outdated and the correct word is transGENDER

eh, some trans people still use the word, usually to signify that they've transitioned. transgender is the more broader umbrella term and therefore more correct to use the vast majority of the time, though.
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