#daydreaming

I feel like for a long time, I've been keen on finding a partner who I love and who reciprocates that same affection for me. In 2019, this mindset dominated my junior year of highschool. I had crushes on many boys I barely knew on the slight chance that a relationship between us might go into something more. None of them really worked out. It's been like this for a long time. Years of obsessing, fantasizing, trying to make things happen. It's like the movie Soul, but instead of focusing on your "spark", you're focused on finding "The One". But those expectations are unfair for your partner and are even more unhealthy for yourself. I've sabotaged myself in order to find the ideal relationship I've been seeking, most likely due to this ideal lover that I've built in my head. I'm trying to work on this. I'm straying further and further away from daydreaming all the time, and trying to adapt the mindset that what's meant to happen will happen. And no matter what, I'll end up with who I'm meant to be with in the long run. I'm trusting fate.

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I think it would take me forever to pick something specific from all the different feelings I whole-heartedly cherish, since I tend to romanticize my life and the tiny details in it, so here is everything that comes up to my mind randomly:

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ೃ Experiencing lazy and quiet days that pass without much noise or action. Days when I just lie in bed with my cat, light a candle, read something, make myself comfortable and enjoy a delicious snack. My favorite thing to do is drink tea or coffee from my favorite cup and enjoy not having to be productive or show off my skills to society (because I have none to begin with). ೃ

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ೃ Due to my depression and social phobia, I constantly question whether I am a burden to certain people or whether I am annoying or simply superfluous. If I am then spontaneously proven wrong, I suddenly feel something indescribable. As if I suddenly have a purpose. ೃ

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ೃ The feeling when I encounter several cats at once is beautiful. Or if I encounter any cats at all. ೃ

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ೃ I really like writing poetry and creating things; be it journals, photographs or other knickknacks. ೃ

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ೃ When little "miracles" happen to me in life that I don't expect, I stop for a moment and am very happy about it. ೃ

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ೃ I like to give gifts to others and write letters. The delighted reaction of people important to me warms my heart. ೃ

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ೃ That feeling when you go to a restaurant, order something totally delicious and just enjoy every bite. ೃ

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ೃ Daydreaming makes me very happy. Especially in combination with music or ASMR. I love ASMR, which combines soft sounds with nature. ೃ

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ೃ There are certain "aesthetics" that make me feel good. Be it Dark Academia, Cottagecore, Vintage or other things that are very specific. ೃ

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ೃ Laughing with friends until your stomach and your cheeks hurt. I haven't had that for ages. ೃ

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ೃ I like tapping on things, touching them or listening to their sounds. I'm probably really too influenced by ASMR. ೃ

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ೃ I like to wander through undiscovered corners, forgotten places and mysterious alleys. It always makes me feel like a protagonist in a fantasy novel. ೃ

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ೃ I generally like different atmospheres and moods that come about in different seasons, in the presence of different people and cultures and life situations. Every time it is a new kind of wonder that is unraveled. ೃ

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ೃ Once a girl in my former school looked into my eyes for a very very long time and, as if hypnotized, listed - in a very quiet voice - all the colors she noticed, and for me that had something very ... magical and unusual. I got goose bumps and was very moved. ೃ

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I'm afraid I've reached the character limit. I tried to look for more unusual emotions because the ordinary ones didn't really come to mind. This was really funny, thanks for the question! ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ♡‧₊˚

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✗

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⠀⠀⠀Before entering the classroom, Elena had heard some of the girls from her class gossiping in hushed whispers, repeatedly mentioning Amy’s name. Suspiciousness and anger began to fill the brunette’s flesh, eyebrows furrowed and mouth agape, ready to defend her friend’s honor. As on cue, the bell rang, indicating that the class has begun. Taking a deep breath to calm down her angered nerves, Elena shook the negative thoughts away and took a seat beside Amy. Resting her hand gently on the other girl’s arm, Elena shot her a sympathetic smile, whispering a quiet ‘ we’ll talk later ’ and focused her gaze on the teacher.

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⠀⠀⠀All throughout the class, she could see ━ no, FEEL and sense how out of it was Amy. Her thoughts were definitely not on the subject their teacher was currently explaining, and Elena couldn’t blame her ━ she, too, was quite bored. Also, Daniel Colin can go and get lost. Why on earth would he want to break this wonderful, full of life, and joyous girl’s heart? He will unquestionably get an earful from Elena. Maybe even a slap across his hideous face. Depends on Elena’s mood later on. While the lesson was coming to an end, Amy asked her whether she wanted to accompany her to the Laurence’s household which Elena agreed to, telling her to keep quiet and at least focus on the task their teacher has given them.

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⠀⠀⠀As the last lesson ended, Elena exited the school’s property, arm linked with Amy’s, smile plastered on her rosy lips. ❛ You can’t possibly be serious! You’ve already moved on from Daniel? Did you even like him in the first place? ❜ The last question was thrown in as a joke, but lowkey Elena meant it more seriously. Oh, only Amy could go from bawling her eyes out over a heartbreak to daydreaming about another guy in only a matter of hours. That’s honestly a talent.

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⠀⠀⠀And no, ━ Amy is not a player and she’s definitely not someone to change partners like a pair of dirty socks. She’s just ━ Amy, a girl who loves painting and causing mischief in her household. ❛ Ah, if only I had your problems! I wished someone would look at me the same way, as well. But no one does. No one ever will. ❜ In this society, being a woman AND a lesbian was a dangerous combination. If the word spread to a certain kind of people, Elena would be locked up in a mental institution for sure. Call it an inappropriate behavior, and illness she needs to get rid of, but Elena would be damned if she had to live her life in a lie, pretending to be someone that she is not.

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⠀⠀⠀They reach the previously mentioned household in half an hour ━ both rosied-cheeked and slightly running out of breaths due to walking fastly. Amy knocks on the door and soon after Laurie opens it, grinning from ear to ear. Although Elena has never met the guy, she oddly feels intimidated by his looks. It feels like he could take Amy away from him, and that is not what she wants in a million years. ❛ Hello. ❜ She quietly greets him, quickly averting her gaze to the ground.

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Takovejch věcí mám strašně moc! Celkově si vždycky říkám, jak je nešťastný, že je člověk sám ve svý zkušenosti strašně izolovanej... Prakticky nemáme šanci reálně poznat, jak ostatní lidi vnímají věci, dokud s nima o tom přímo nemluvíme, a i potom je to dost ošemetný (je tvoje hnědá barva to, čemu i já říkám hnědá barva?).
Příklad - o mým bratrancovi si všichni asi do jeho šesti let mysleli, že je mentálně postiženej. Na spoustu věcí nereagoval, špatně četl, nešly mu sporty a tak dále. Ukázalo se, že má na obou očích 8 dioptrií. Nebyl pomalejší, prostě jenom neviděl, ale myslel si, že je to normální, protože nikdy nepoznal nic jinýho.
Co se mě týče, nejvíc se mi tyhle věci stávají u "mentálních aktivit", nebo jak to nazvat. Vždycky jsem si třeba myslela, že moje sny jsou úplně normální, a teprve s postupem času jsem se dozvěděla, že JE divný ve snech zažívat vlastní smrt, ve snech vědět, že jsou to sny, ovládat sny a tak podobně. Stejně tak jsem si vždycky myslela, že maladaptive daydreaming je něco, co prostě reálně každej jednotlivec má, že takhle lidi prostě normálně přemýšlí. Ale prej ne.
Pak jsou tady takový ty "úsměvnější" věci, třeba jsem si až asi do 17 myslela, že nezvladatelnej sexuální pud je jenom výmysl filmovýho průmyslu, aby v romantickejch filmech byly zápletky :--) Takže nad věcma jako "nemohl jsem si pomoct, prostě jsem se s ní musel vyspat!" jsem vždycky zvedala obočí, protože sakra, chlape, jako čím sis nemohl pomoct, kdo tě ksakru nutil?! Hah, ukázalo se, že jsem to opět já, kdo je divnej.

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You see . . . .

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~ you whimpersnatchers are too young to remember nor know . . .

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~ but, when the EU was young & hope was new . . .

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~ we tried this . . . . when I was in 'P6' , we tried leaving GMT on Central European Time . . . .
~ the same as British Summer Time (BST) . .

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~ I think it was winter '67/'68 , or the next . . . .

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~ I recall . daydreaming , watching great snowflakes falling in the dark , outside the classroom's enormous floor to ceiling, wall to wall windows . . .
The kids were walking to school in the dark . . . . the nambees all had reflective patches sewn to their coats . . . .

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~ of course , the country's infrastructure , industry could easily have moved their start & finish time 'forward' (later) . . . . just like agriculture has always done ; still do ; always will do . . . .

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~ but of course 98% of people. non-agriculturals , live & die without ever knowing what life is about . . . . . can't stretch their tiny retarded minds around such a simple sensible concept ~ no-loling ~

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Здравствуй, моя хорошая!

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ᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚ Честно? Никогда не возникало подобных мыслей. Сейчас многие подумают, что у меня завышен уровень ЧСВ и самооценка на уровне потолка, но как же вы окажетесь неправы... Я просто не позволяю кому - либо думать (а в первую очередь себе) , что есть те, кто ЛУЧШЕ меня. Если вы будете задумываться об этом, то деградация и самобичевание вам обеспечены.

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ᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚⓂⓎ ⒾⒹⒺⒶⓁⓈ : ↓
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⠀ На самом деле, у меня не так много идеалов / людей, которые служат неким рычагом для стремления к чему - либо. Именно они вдохновляют меня и дают силы для дальнейшего движения : ↓
ᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚ Елена Темникова.
ᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚ Ольга Серябкина.
ᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚ Юрий Дудь.
ᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚ И, конечно же, самый неидеальный идеал - мой Кирилл.
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ᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚⓂⓎ ⒸⓄⓂⓅⓁⒺⓍⒺⓈ : ↓
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⠀ А давай эта тема останется закрытой? У меня есть определённые комплексы и недостатки, с которыми я борюсь. Не хочу говорить обо всём, ибо люди - это мрази, которые, узнав о твоих уязвимых местах, будут бить ИМЕННО ТУДА.
╚=====================================╝

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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀♫ Nelly Furtado – All Good Things ♫
⠀⠀⠀https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pBo-GL9SRg

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ᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚ « We are what we don ' t see
ᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚᅚ Missed everything daydreaming »

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▼ Спасибо за вопрос!

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Hi em, trước khi muốn dịch được từ này phải hiểu được nghĩa của nó, mà anh không hiểu em ạ :)) Anh thấy nghĩa của từ mông lung hết sức... mông lung :))

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Anh có Google qua thử qua thì có khá nhiều nghĩa và trường hợp ứng dụng. Nếu em muốn hỏi "mông lung" với nghĩa là "không rõ, không xác định cụ thể, mơ hồ", ví dụ như trong ngữ cảnh: "tao không biết cách giải bài toán này, thấy mông lung quá" hoặc "chả biết tương lai tao làm cái vẹo gì được nữa, mông lung quá" thì theo anh từ sát nghĩa nhất sẽ là "unsure" hoặc "uncertain". Nếu nói về tương lai kiểu như có nhiều điều mông lung có thể dùng danh từ "uncertainties", cá nhân anh rất thích chữ này =]]

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Ngoài ra thì có một nghĩa nữa của từ mông lung là: "mờ mịt, khung cảnh rộng lớn" ví dụ như trong câu "cảnh mông lung của một buổi sáng sương mù" thì cách sử dụng này anh không tìm được từ thay thế trong tiếng Anh.

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Nào ra có một từ cũng có tính chất nghĩa tương tự như mông lung là "vague", kiểu như thiếu thông tin chi tiết, mơ hồ. Ví dụ như câu: "They had only a vague idea where the place was." (Tụi nó chỉ nhớ mông lung, nhớ sơ sơ chỗ đó thôi chứ không rành đường tới đó lắm.)

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Còn có thêm 1 cách dùng nữa là trong câu "suy nghĩ mông lung", tức là kiểu như cứ ngồi đó chả suy nghĩ gì cụ thể hết, đầu óc cứ bay bay. Để diễn tả ý nghĩa này có thể dùng chữ "day-dreaming" hoặc là "let someone's mind wander", ví dụ: He doesn't pay attention in class, he just sits there letting his mind wander. À mà cũng có 1 cách sử dụng là "nó suy nghĩ LUNG lắm" thì chữ LUNG này lại có nghĩa là suy nghĩ nhiều, chứ không phải là mơ mộng đầu óc bay bay nha :))

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Chúc em tìm được câu trả lời của mình. Mấy vấn đề về tiếng Anh em có thể nhắn tin cho anh trên Insta nhé: https://www.instagram.com/whereiskhang/

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I finished my work at home an hour and a half earlier than i expected, cuz thanks to my Capri moon i was super efficient and hardworking, then started mentally contragulating myself for being so capable and brilliant and anticipating the sweet taste of validation for finishing sooner cuz that's why i could go out earlier to present the result of my work sooner, which is some Leo Mars antics...And on my way to the place where i was going to present my finished product, i realized i forgot said product, lost in the aforementioned daydreaming about how great i am and how perfect is everything...which is some Pisces/12th house dominance shit right there...
And right now my Gemini sun is sitting on my bed and typing about what happened on askfm rather than going out to present the fucking product ALREADY.

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