#funny

404 K people

50 posts

Posts:

https://jpst.it/2GKxZ ⠀⊱⠀▬▬▬

dancing__with__stranger’s Profile Photo✧⠀mihrimah⠀⊱⠀▬▬▬
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀❝ https://justpaste.it/Sun__x__Moon__III
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀digging for kryptonite on this one way street
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀only a man in a funny red sheet looking for
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀special ⠀⠀things⠀⠀ ⠀inside⠀⠀⠀ of⠀⠀⠀⠀ me
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀✧✧⠀⠀✧✧⠀⠀✧✧⠀⠀✧✧⠀⠀✧✧⠀⠀✧✧⠀⠀✧✧
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

View more

httpsjpstit2GKxZ

2x4 nils on the trot for Liverpool, while the Toon are doomed HELP !!!!!! lol #howeoutwewantpotch

princessali6’s Profile PhotoMáire Ní Einstein
I would love to see that scoreline on out next match and crush Everton! 😍 But the media say that Howe is the best English Manager around...apart from Sir Gareth of course! 😂 You'll beat Norwich in mid week. That will be the turning point! I'm very hopeful! It would be funny if you got Potch! 😂 X

Tita do you even get angry or pissed? How do you control it?

Haha do I? Omg I'm horrible. It's so funny because social media hides everything ugly and unpleasant so we assume those things don't exist! Everyone gets angry. It's not attractive. We all try our best to do better. We often fail. Most importantly, social media is a lie.

View more

Pros and cons of dating you?

Pros :I'm nice, friendly, i like cuddles, I'm a good cook, play video games, watch football, i don't like cheating, i try to be very supportive, i will hate the same people you hate 😂 I don't like fights
Cons :I'm not very confident, I get jealous, when I get angry better stay away, I don't think I'm that funny 😅
The rest you'll have to find out alone 😂

View more

It's ALWAYS funny when someone says they don't like your taste in music, fashion, art, literature etc. esp. if it's coming from someone beneath you. It's actually a compliment. Imagine if someone as classy and educated as me shared interests with someone...like that. There'd be something wrong.

We get it,, you dress ugly and are a cxnt. Anyways. Nobody tell my husband, but he's right🥴 I am hard to shop for lmao idek what I want.

View more

What are adjectives people commonly use to describe you?

Quirky, nice, happy, friendly, lovely and cute are probably the ones I hear most often from my friends, co workers and girlfriend.
I guess I'd agree with all of those. My husband adds in funny - I generally don't think of myself as a funny person but I can be around people I am really super comfortable with.
Intense - Easily the top one I get. It sounds negative, but the second I want to get into details on the meaning I'm just proving I'm intense apparently. Smart - Sure, I agree. Strong - They mean mentally and I don't know if I agree or not. Mostly I disagree, but I'm not dead so maybe they have a point. Hard headed/Stubborn - ...yeah. Crazy - Well documented so yeah.
Weird/eccentric - Seems to be used when people don't want to say "crazy," so sure. Meticulous - I got this a lot at work. I would agree that I am on some things. Funny - I don't really agree on that, but people laugh so I dunno. Sarcastic - Much easier for me to agree with than a general "funny." High maintenance - I don't think I'm that bad honestly. Lazy - Used often when I'm depressed. Disagree. I'm depressed. Big difference.
I think quirky is the most common. I'm called mothering, eloquent, concise, forward, loud, smart, annoying.
Funny, cute, beautiful, kind hearted, sympathetic, easy going, relaxed, patient, talkative, empathetic, genuine.
Intimidating, quiet, patronizing, really fucking smart, overthinker, neurotic, 'magnanimous with the cloves,' ambitious, kind, a comrade, a team player, overcommitter, procrastinator, hipster.
I agree with the negatives mostly. I'm struggling to correct them. Magnanimous with the cloves is probably my favorite description ever (I used to smoke cloves, and give them away to whoever asked, no questions back).
Cute, Sweet, Warm, Girl Next Door, Worrisome, Intelligent, INNOCENT. I don't get it, no matter my personality I get innocent. I guess I could agree with some of them, maybe not the innocent one (and I have no idea what people mean when they tell me I'm the girl next door. They barely know me).

View more

♡ --- https://ask.fm/vaporpurpleisxms/answers/171128830888

vaporpurpleisxms’s Profile Photo♡ Rouge. ♡
⎯ "Athough I'm crazy, I'm curious too!"
❖Commented the clown laughing and soon after listening to the story of Rouge, which left her surprised at the end.❖
⎯ "Wow! That's cool, would I be able to get to know this world of yours someday and see more of these other cute creatures like ya?Awww! Hahaha! Shadow? Is this your suitor's name? What a different name... ugly. It's just kidding! That sounds funny! I think it's my turn now, yes?"
❖A light air escaped between her lips covered in red tones and the blonde's story began.❖
⎯ "Well, I was part of a circus and then I ran away... Hm... Hahahaha! I'm kidding again! It was just to relax! So I... worked in a nursing home here in the city as a psychiatrist in the past, everything was fine until I met an idiot who claimed to be my patient and turned my whole life upside down after we got involved..."
❖She said looking straight and serious at the caricature of her ex partner drawn over a dart board on her wall.❖
⎯ "And the rest... for him I left everything I had, starting to follow the criminal world and getting into other problems... it wasn't easy... And these days, I'm looking to overcome all the terror I went through with him..."

View more

httpsaskfmvaporpurpleisxmsanswers171128830888

https://ask.fm/gwendolynpoole/answers/168568456178

gwendolynpoole’s Profile PhotoGwenpool
❖Harley also paid attention to the girl, mainly in the way the masked one appeared to be very friendly at first. The blonde soon had her hearing taken by the pronunciation of her name that reminded her a lot of her friend (from another universe).❖
⎯ "Gwen...pool? How funny, ya have almost the same name as a friend of mine! Hahahaha! Ya might know him, or... hey, hey, wait!!! Are ya a lost child of his and I don't know anything about it?! Woow!"

View more

httpsaskfmgwendolynpooleanswers168568456178

You go through men like it's funny

There is a uniform that landscape photographers wear. Dark jeans, brown boots, a beanie over hair that is held perfectly in place by product so that it has all of the ruggedness of a windswept Britain without any of the, yknow, wind. These photographers will spend an hour with a camera and ten hours with Lightroom and Photoshop. The end result will be posted on Instagram with a comment like "So blessed to have been able to capture this shot" as if they haven't been pulling and stretching at the curves and luminescence until it looks absolutely nothing like that blessed shot.
He was one of these photographers. There was no emotion to it. It didn't blow him away, the world. One of the first things he said to me was that it was really unfair that I had more followers on Instagram than he did. So maybe that should have been a red flag, but it just looked a little rosy at that stage.
Anyway, it was a couple of months in. He said he wanted to take pictures of me - but naked, posed in a bath. At this point in time, I couldn't even look at myself in a swimsuit - I haven't been in the water in months. I was still adjusting to life post-You. I wasn't eating. I was working out 4 to 8 hours a day.
And he wanted my body to adjust, the same way he did with landscapes. To analyse it, dissect it, find it wanting. And god knows I was finding it wanting - enough for both of us, enough for the whole goddamned world. I said I wasn't comfy with that, and he disregarded it. Said that he'd find a way to make me comfy with the idea.
Long story short, he didn't. I said "we want different things." He said that I was being - and I quote - a frigid bitch. It didn't feel funny to me.

View more

Good morning @shaireen How was your day? It's really funny your tale about your ID card, the day before yesterday was the elections in my country and the ID card is vital, and I've forgotten. We really have a lot of things in common 😄😄

josequiroga93’s Profile Photojose.quiroga93
Hello, Jose! It's good, quite peaceful. How about you?
I'm sorry that you have to drive back home tho. My tricks aren't applicable to your situation, perhaps you can try it next time hahaha opss, I'm such a bad influence.🤣 It's amazing to find my sibling from another mother who lives on the other side of the world😆👌🏻

View more

What childhood show do you miss watching?

H2o_o2H’s Profile Photo
it's funny - as a child I mostly watched detectivists, "midsomer murdеrs" and things like "mythbusters", and now I want to watch some stuрid sitcom like alf
so in the plans for this vacation: "Phineas and Ferb", "the Big Bang theory" (hope I won't fall asleep at the middle), "gravity falls", the star wars series (stuрid enough), and I'm going to rewatch "Batman forever"

View more

What makes/convinces you to follow someone on here?

BlueEyesWhiteGuy’s Profile PhotoReaper
I only really follow people who have interesting answers. It's none of my business if people want to answer with "idk" or other one word answers, but I definitely would never follow someone on here that does that. I like learning about people, and I can only really do that if a person puts a little effort into their answers. I'm also likely to follow someone if I like their sense of humour too. I guess just being a nice person, interesting, funny etc. Those are the qualities I look for most! 🙂

View more

How to grieve after the loss of a dog? He was put to sleep on November 8.

I’m deeply sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and your family during this time. You should look at old photographs of Rocket, talk about the funny things about Rocket, share stories of Rocket. If you have taken any videos, please watch them. I know it’s hard to lose someone this way, especially when it’s your own pet. Saying goodbye was probably the hardest part of your life that you had to go through. But just know, deep down inside, Rocket loves you so much and thanks you for caring for him during his years.
In Chinese culture, when someone passes away, they say that “Life is Sweet”. So to honor your lost loved one, you go and eat something sweet. Eat something sweet like an ice cream or a donut or an apple fritter. Anything that screams sweet to you. This might not help you with your grieving process, but just know that life is sweet, even if there’s cruelity to it.
Your dogs name is Rocket, you told me after posting this.

View more

Recommend me a book (fictional)✨

Ambyrose21’s Profile PhotoRose
See, the thing is... we all wanna be remembered. But she isdifferent. She knows the truth. She didn't want a million admirers, she just wanted one. And she got it. Maybe she wasn't loved widely, but she was loved deeply. And isn't that more than most of us get? When She was sick, I knew I was dying, but I didn't wanna say so. She was in the ICU when I snuck in for ten minutes and I just sat with her before I got caught. Her eyes were closed, her skin pale, but her hands were still her hands, still warm, and her nails were painted this dark blue black color, and... I just held them. And I willed myself to imagine a world without us and what a worthless world that would be. She's so beautiful. You don't get tired of looking at her. You never worry if she's smarter than you, 'cause you know she is. She's funny without ever being mean. I love her. God, I love her, I'm so lucky to love her.You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world, but you do have a say in who hurts you. And I like my choices. I hope she likes hers.
And that is how I wanted things to end , if there was an end.
Fault in our stars.

View more

Anybody else love dark, gloomy, rainy days?

Rain is my favorite weather. I love cozy rainy day indoors with tea and books and cooking. I also enjoy walking in the rain, which many people don't understand. I bike to and from work any my co workers are always so worried about me when it rains, but I love it! Especially in summer when you've been hot all day and then the sky pours down. Its really exhilarating! I’ve loved rain since I was about 12 years old! I’ve always felt more productive and creative on those days. I tend to leave the house more often when it’s raining! Now I’m almost twenty three and I find myself getting almost depressed if it stays sunny for too long. I need rain! When I tell others it’s therapeutic for me, I really mean it. My mom is the same way! I think my love for the rain started really early on because of her. She always puts on nice calm music, leaves the windows open, lights all the candles around the house. In the past when it was a bigger storm, we always made donuts. We stopped what we were doing and chose a book, documentary, movie or board game! Some kind of activity to do together. Those were the best days!
One of my favorite things to do is go camping during a thunderstorm. I love the sound of the thunder and rain. I find it funny whenever there’s a big storm and everyone complains that they hardly got any sleep and yet I slept like a baby.
Yes. And it's the perfect time for all that stuff, but not until after I've gone out and soaked up the cold and wet. I thrive on these kinds of days. If it's not 40f or lower, and wet, count me out.
Yep except turn my love for rain up just a tiny notch. Thunderstorms where at any moment lightning can fuck your shit up? Sign me up. Torrential rain where even at your windshield wipers highest speed it can't keep up? Yes please. I don't know why but I absolutely love regular rainfall but there's just something about violent storms that calm me down and makes me feel at ease. As if everything is gonna be okay... that make any sense? I'm quite happy with rain, but I would say that mist/fog is my favourite kind of weather. You get the coolness of rain, without getting soaked to the skin. I also love how the cloud seems to envelop everything, acting like a giant sound blanket. Makes everything seem very peaceful. I have always loved the Autumn. It gets dark early, there’s lots of wind and rain of course. Storms are nice too. In the forest, but also at the beach. And it’s cozy inside with the lights on, candles, coffee, and a good book.
I am blissfully happy when it's dark, cold and rainy. People actually expect you to curl up under blankets with books and hot drinks. Now my children love rainy days because of how excited I get.
That is my absolute favorite type of day. Winter is my favorote season (where I live the weather is pretty much how you described during winter). My birthday is also on the winter solstice! I'm so ready for this unbearable heat to go away. I need me some rain and clouds!

View more

What have you learnt from your time on Ask?

AisyahIsHere2’s Profile PhotoAisyahpotated
Any experience that makes you think that it only happened to you, that it's some dirty secret that you're carrying around - someone else will put a hand up and say "me too."
People are kinder than you know.
Some people will be lovely and think that you're funny, others will think you're a self-righteous twat. Both of these people could be right, so best just to stay neutral about the whole thing.
There are a lot more feet people in the world than you might expect.

View more

De cand ai criticat-o pe Lorena nu te mai suporta unele. Se stie ca daca te iei de Lorena, te iei de toate. Ea e queen bee. :))

😂nu e nimeni queen bee ca nu suntem in filmele americane si oricum oamenii trebuie sa aiba personalitate, nu sa fie ca oile. Eu sunt queen bee in realitate, in orice gasca ma duc sunt centrul atentiei. La cursuri am fost recunoscuta “cea mai bine imbracata” din clasa. La liceu, funny, imi spuneau “the biggest boobies”. La Medicina sunt sute de fete populare si frumoase asa ca nu iese in evidenta mult. Si eu i-am spus tot ce aveam pe fata. De pe cate conturi sa te mai blochez? Block la urmatoarea

View more

Post 20 facts about yourself 🙂

1. In my 30s
2. Stubborn
3. Un convincable
4. Moody
5. Old is Gold style
6. Funny
7. Traditional
8.i drive a jeep
9. Kuwaiti
10. Trying to melt the karsh
11. Fav color is red
12. I love winter
13. Love flowers
14. Want to see Kashmir one day
15. Hate weddings
16. Im not a brand lover
17. Im a hobbit
18. I love fruits
19. Costa is my home
20. Old movies is my thing

View more

Why everyone underestimate hw i feel ,its rare that i tell anyone,and even samarrize alot ,and they ignore me ,i didnt even ask them to care they get curious, and u know the funny thing they get so emotional when they hear the same story +anothor source ..it makes me feel delusional

Delusion is a false fixed belief , You Say that ppl get curious about You Even so You don't Say much and when You try to express your feelings they underestimate You and your feelings
اي ابتلاء الناس موصلتش لادراكه أو معايشوهوش لدرجه قريبه أو محصلش مع حد قريب منهم ، بس حصل مع غيرهم غالبا هيبقي صعب عليهم يفهموا انت مريت بايه و اتصرفت ازاي و حالتك كانت ايه ، هل دا معناه أنهم وحشيين و تعاطفهم معاك مزيف؟! غالبا اه ، هم بس مش فاهمين مش مستوعبين إن ممكن يجي يوم ويتحطوا في نفس الموقف ويحسوا بنفس المشاعر ، اعتقد نحاول منستناش حد يفهمنا أو يحس بينا و منحملش الناس فوق طاقتهم

View more

What's so special about you?

I will continue to refine my learning and grow exponentially more intelligent in my field. I stopped eating much sugar probably a year ago. After that, I really noticed that I no longer have an urge to eat sugar. Cupcakes, cookies, ice cream... none of it really intrigues me. If I eat syrup it's basically disgusting. I'm really happy that I am now this way. I think I sleep better, too.
Not exactly super unique, but I'm a brown person who grew up in an all white area (didn't meet another brown person other than my father, or the Indian kid in elementary school until ~8th grade). Additionally, I was put up for adoption as soon as I was born, and adopted at 4 by a mixed couple. As such, I've never met my parents, and have absolutely no sense of racial identity. If you were to ask me what I am, the best you'd likely get is either "Not white" or "Brown". But past that...nothing.
The only thing I can ever think of for this question is that I wasn't born in a hospital. I was delivered in my brother's bedroom at home because my parents didn't want to pay the hospital bills.
I hate a bit myself till the point to want to become day after day a better person and the best way to do so it's helping the others, even stranger. I'm not worthy of loving myself if I cannot love the others who really need some help.
I always want to see others happy, even if I'm sacrificing something for it.
My work now has been super cool and interesting (and really fucking hard) but sadly I'm not allowed to talk about it until it's done. It's also stressing me out because I'm waiting on approval for the next milestone, and I don't know where I'm living once I move away from university until then. If it doesn't come through I don't really know what to do. Graduate level work is practically a waste of my time, but I didn't ace my degree (I did maybe 6 weeks of work over 3 years) so I don't look that competitive. I feel so demotivated and that I've let myself down. I accidentally went on an around-the-world trip as a nomad. I went on a 2 week vacation but decided not to come back, so my friends helped move my things out of my apartment and shipped my laptop to Southeast Asia. I visited 19 countries across Asia, Middle East and Europe, working the entire time at 9-5 job remotely via laptop, staying in hostels and couch surfing. My free Wi-Fi spideysense is world class.
I say this often as a joke, but I genuinely think I’m pretty good at being mundane. My interests are extremely weak and limited, I have no talents or redeeming qualities, not super funny, not super smart etc etc. You could probably name any trait and I either won’t have it or I’ll have it to such a minor degree that you’re better off finding someone else. There is quite literally nothing interesting about me and I find that very interesting.

View more

Akhri bar kahin ghiray huye paisay kb milay thy😅.(no serious ans.only funny:) )

AroojA2020’s Profile Photoربیعہ
Yar i literally found hazar ka note in my university's corridor,i was with my two friends.i started dancing, Mene itne koi heavyy nargis walay step maaray or peeche lab main se zor zor se hansne ki awaazain ayin i turned around or lab ki lights off thin because of the projector or andar se puri class or meri favorite teacher miss Muqaddas mjhe dekh k hans rahay thy ;-;
I could never look in her eyes again ;-; FML

View more

Hola! Todo bien? Tanto tiempo.. 😌 Que le paso a Ask? Tantas cuentas falsas y vacías, tantos cambios absurdos me han alejado un poco.. ¿Cual es tu razón por la cual sigues entrando a esta red social? Ok, si quieres pregúntame, deja un MG a mi nueva respuesta o si lo deseas 🔥.. Hasta la próxima ;)

JonasRiquelme’s Profile PhotoJonás Gabriel
Because I like answering questions and if someone likes my answer I add him/her among people I follow and time to time I check their walls and like their answer if I find some to be funny or interesting or with nice picture 🙂

View more

Famous karwa doo koe? XD

make a dirty video, talk dirty.
wear dirty shit, spread dirty shit.
like that girl who was talking about how this world cup ruined her first night.
YOU'LL BE A STAR. YOU'LL GO VIRAL.
this nation is nonsense,
they find dirty things funny, valuable, & precious!
be a fu*kin smuggler, po*nstar, hoe, rapist, gangster, and you'll be the god father for this generation. 🌚🥀

View more