I'm sure she's so sad & feels exactly the same way. Sorry bae. :/
it's miserable. it really is fucking miserable.
( previous poem anon ) thank you so much anyways :-) ps you're v sweet
no problem! i remember a bit of it but i wanna make sure i have it right before i tell it to ya. aw, thank you, cutie, you're sweeter. n_n
okay hi I really hope you remember this/I hope this is the right person, but when you were on your old account (h-xrold ?) in your bio, you had this thing that said something about galaxies and constellations and palms and cosmos and it was a love thing and do you remember how it goes? ty if u do:-)
i'm so sorry i don't remember how it goes at the moment, sweetheart, but it was probably one of those small poems i've made up. i'll look for it in my notebooks and if i find it or think of it i'll let you know as soon as possible, yeah? x
Do you still love her?
of course i still love her, she was my everything. we didn't even get closure, which hurts really bad. and the first of this month was our anniversary, guess how hard i cried. so yeah, i absolutely do still love her but i guess i'll have to get over it.
AWE, you're so sweet. tysfm <333
anytime, cutie. never ever ever forget it. <33
idk, i feel like it sometimes, but thanks a lot :-))
you're not though, i promise. you are very valuable and precious and you should never ever be thrown away. you are a very important part of our world. ♡
What was your Polyvore username?
i've had like a shit ton but i'll try to list them all omg. niall3rjames, arcticnialls, h-xrold, h4-rrystyles, harrystyl-es, marziugh, pezzugh, shutupzayn, to-nkin, stfuniall, a jade anon i can't remember the username for, haztille, and my last was peztille. i don't even remember my personal/rp accounts bc that was like years and years ago
I FEEL YA WITH THE WHOLE GARBAGE THING MAN.
YOU ABSOLUTELY ARE NOT GARBAGE, SWEETHEART.
nah man i love u most also ur not trash ur perfect n beautiful ok
nah bro i love u hecka most alright
and thank u i really don't know what i'd do without you
and thank u i really don't know what i'd do without you
so are you really never coming back to polyvore? i've tried that a lot but it never works out.
it's hard to tell right now, because i've left plenty of times but always seem to find myself signing back up somehow. if i did come back, it wouldn't be for a long while, because if i'm gonna come back i need a fucking long break. and if i did come back i more than likely would not be an anon. i'd make a personal, so i could talk to the friends that i did have and possibly roleplay like i used to before i became an anon and continue to make sets because using sets as an artistic outlet has always been really comforting to me. but i wouldn't come back as an anon because the anon world is a gigantic piece of shit and kind of lame.
oh gosh. what happened?
i've told this story like thirty times since it happened but hopefully this can be the last time because it kinda sucks/hurts to talk about. um, i'm pretty sure everyone and their mom on here knows i was dating siena, i had been since january. but um, us being very deep into our relationship and comfortable with each other, our texts kind of got.. inappropriate sometimes, as they do with your girlfriend/boyfriend. we'd talk about anything and everything and one day we decided to exchange some.. suggestive? gifs from tumblr. and her parents found those texts, and she got in a ton of trouble. her parents made her 'break up' with me but obviously we continued talking on polyvore. i guess she eventually got caught talking to me there because she stopped replying for like two weeks straight and i didn't know why but on friday my mom woke me up and blah blah blah everything i said in the answer before this one. they sat me on the porch and introduced themselves and told me they worked in the division that deals with cybercrime and such. and then they asked me if i knew siena. so naturally i started freaking out because it all became clear to me why they were there and i teared up because i thought i was going to get in so much trouble. they said that they were mostly there to confirm that i was who i said i was, an 18 year old girl and not some 50 year old man, but also regarding the texts/messages sent to siena. it kind of pissed me off because why was i getting the blame for the texts when it was clear that i wasn't the only one sending them. they asked me 543895 questions and wrote down everything i said and were really sympathetic to me, thankfully. they didn't yell at me or scold me or tell me i was going to get arrested for sending pornography to a minor (a minor that was apparently 14 and i had no idea) but to treat it as a warning and as my 'first adult thing i've done' which i joked 'i thought my first adult thing would be like paying taxes' and they laughed and i was like ya the police think i'm funny. but yeah, rather than getting arrested or written up like i thought i would (and was in tears about) they just said that it was important i 'close that chapter of my life' meaning no more siena practically ever or i could get in serious legal trouble. but yeah, that happened. it was great. and since meeting and interacting with someone on polyvore has nearly fucked up my whole future (me going to college to be a teacher wouldn't really work with a sex offender charge would it?) i'm taking their advice and closing this chapter of my life, because polyvore has never really been a friend to me.
do you know why they showed up at your house?
well when my mom called up the stairs 'kedra there's some people here to see you' the moment i woke up and i go downstairs and find two people i don't know standing by my front door and ask me to come out to the porch to talk to me for a little of course i had no idea what the fuck was going on but obviously after they spoke to me i was pretty sure of what had happened and what was going to happen
not so sure how important that is right now but single.
the police came to your house because of polyvore?
not the in-uniform-with-badges-and-a-warrant-for-my-arrest police but two special agents from the department of homeland security did come to my house.
… be. i just wanted you to hear the words). xox
i think you misunderstood me when i said that i was done. i didn't mean that i was done in general, as in i want to die or something along those lines, i just meant that i'm done with polyvore. i don't plan on going back to that toxic website because in the long run all it does is make me sad, which i definitely don't need in this journey to trying to make myself as happy as i can possibly be. polyvore only provides a moment, a day, a summer of happiness and then something ruins it. it was supposed to be fun and happy but as of recently things that happen on polyvore have been affecting people outside of the internet. people get bullied and people get their feelings hurt or if you're me the fucking police shows up at your house because of something that happened on polyvore. and for those reasons, i quit. and i do realize that i don't need someone else loving me to be happy. i don't rely on romantic partners for happiness. i, like any other human, need platonic love to keep me happy, yeah, but i don't need to have someone on my hip to be happy. i have art, and friends, and food, and a future, and i am breathing and that in itself is enough for me to be happy. i did used to rely on others to make me happy but as i'm getting older i'm becoming more independent and i hope that everyone that relies on others for happiness will begin to see that, too. thank you for caring about me and taking the time to say this to me, i appreciate it. you're a sweetheart.