I pulled the test out and opened my eyes....I am pregnant. I wrapped it in tissue and put it in the bin got up and washed my hands. I went back into the room and lay in between jamals legs as he played with my hair. it's defo his because I've used a condom with every one else,I just couldn't tell him,I didn't know how to tell him, I'm scared he might leave me,I looked up at him as he looked down.
Me: I'm pregnant and it's your baby
Jamal: wtf. r u being serious
Me: yea....
Jamal: I can't do this. I have to go
Me: I thought you said u will be there for me no matter what
Jamal: I can't have a baby with a sket!
Me: I can't believe you just said that
By this time tears was streaming down my face,how could he say that to me?
jamal: look I
Me: GET OUT!
he got his things and left. see this is why I was a sket people being mean to me doing things to hurt me, no1 ever loving me. I feel so dirty that's why I was a sket, and you wanna know why? I was raped! that's why I'm like this.
*flashback*
Me: GET OF ME
Rapist: it's ok keep calm.
Trying all my hardest to push him off I could not do it. he pinned me to the ground,taking my leggings off,and my knickers,kissing my neck...
*back to reality*
I don't even wanna think about it,that happened to me when I was 12! that man stole my virginity, I haven't even felt the same since. no one's cared enough about me, for me to have the courage to tell them about it. I was gonna tell jamal but oh well. no one will love me,only this baby. I said looking down at my stomach smiling 😊. maybe this could work. actually I was wrong,I walked to my window and opened it wide,I sat down on the ledge with my legs dangling out,maybe if I lean forward all this pain would go away. I threw myself out the window.
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