Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die! Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers.
Tom, you sent me this twice, but anyway, we've gotten alot closer recently and you're one of my best friends, I can trust you with anything and you know you can talk to me about anything, your actually hilarious and maths last year was the best, p.s your sideburns are funny but cute aha, and remember to shave your moustache;-)xx