@abelleinbk

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Never met good friends sons father. Now me and good friend no longer speak but possibility we will at some pt. turns out guy I'm dating and really liking is friends sons father. (He relocated to my city that's how I met him. I'm in a pickle. What do Ido, stop dating him?

Give her the head's up. If things work out, you could be step mother to the kid someday. You would want her to tell you, no?
You don't have to ask permission since you are not friends any longer. Just tell her.

Will you have a destination wedding?? I so see something beachy for you...

Nope. Mum has taken over planning. We're going traditional (sorta).

Is it possible for love to conquer all? I have a physical pain in my chest for a man that I can't be with right now--he was separated when we met. Now, "working it out for the kids". I have been in love before, never like this. I walked away b/c it was right thing. But I want him back so bad.

no. love does not conquer all. only in Hollywood.
he was still married when you met him, and he has told you that he is going back to his wife. doesn't matter whether it's for the kids or her, he's gone back. bottomline.
it's unfortunate that you are in love with an unavailable man, but the bottomline is he is unavailable.
you did the right thing by walking. not keep doing it. and consider-- no jokes-- seeing a therapist. to engage in a relationship with an unavailable man (separated is still married) and then to pine after him speaks to a self-esteem issue. that's a YOU issue, not a "he left" issue.

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Fiancé and I have had issues with his ex. Is it insane to insist that if she contact him ever again that he should tell me? And remind her not to contact him?

the problem isn't her contacting him. he can't and you can't stop her from emailing, calling or getting on social media (you can block the number/account she usually calls from.) him responding is the issue. if he's already told her to stop calling, then he's done all he can do. if he's still in contact with her after saying that he would not be, that's an issue.
not crazy to ASK that he tell you if she contacts him. but understand if he's already told her not to call, and she keeps calling, him answering even to say, "stop" is still answering. it's negative attention, but attention nonetheless.

Long term healthy relationship, lots of marriage talk. asked what's keeping him from proposing thinking its money related. Said he's been silently dealing with past fam issues.admitted to being afraid of divorce. can counseling help or should I leave now?

ask him to go to counseling-- separate and together. everyone has fears/ issues. whether they are willing to address/overcome them or not is what makes the difference.

Met dude,texted for a few days..he disappeared (I texted last&no response) 2 wks l8r he texts& says sry for disappearing he had alot going on. I said "no prob" cuz 2 me we just met BUT it made me wonder if it was a red flag that he just disappeared like that..I saw yes bt no 2 since we weren't datin

when you're actually interested in someone and you're normal, and you have a lot going on, "you say, "hey, got a lot going on right now. mind if i give you a call when i come up for air." or something like that, because you don't want them to think they disappeared. red flag.
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Do you know of any agencies that help with fixing credit?! I feel that's the only thing that is holding me back from committing to a relationship?

Google.

Re: yes very common. I'm currently wedding planning and while I'm ecstatic to marry my fiancé if rather grate my nipples on a zester than plan a wedding! I think it's a huge stereotype that women are overjoyed about weddings.

THANK YOU!!!!!! going to weddings? fine. in a wedding? fine. getting married? fine. but planning a wedding? gag.

Meeting bfs sister....his mom hates me. Im nervous. Please help.

be the best version of yourself. you're dating him, not his sister... or his mother.

had a talk w/ a guy I was dating and ended things b/c we weren't on the same page commitment wise. I cut my losses but he still reaches out regularly. I keep responses short & sweet, don't see him in person anymore + no intimacy so what gives? do u think this a case of him "keeping me in the pocket"

basically.

Found out my besties mom has cancer and has to have survey friend and mom live in diff city. I offered to fly out but bestie says no. Should I go anyway? It would be this weeken when her fam is gathering at the hospital for notice of surgeries or other news. If I don't go what else can I do?

send flowers. you asked-- nice gesture-- she said no. stay put. if she didn't have any other family, i would say go anyway, but she won't be alone. check in with her that night to see if mom is okay and see how bestie's mom is.

not a question- saw your pinterest posts & just wanted to say that I'm so happy for you!! I've been following your blog/twitter acct for years and to see you go from not sold on marriage to being so giddy in the moment is special :) congratulations!!

lol. i'm giddy about the actual marriage, the man, and the dress/ accessories. the wedding. meh. that's actually not true. excited about the wedding. no desire whatsoever to actually plan it. hmm... is this common?
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Liked by: BLAKE

Is It bad that I don't like my fiances brother? He's a deadbeat who smokes wee all dy and doesn't work. My fiancé is even having to pick up the tab for his tux etc when we agreed we weren't helpi family out for OUR wedding. I'm so irritated by him.

there's nothing you can do about this. be polite and keep your distance. understood that you didn't want to pay for his tux, but it's HIS BROTHER. you're gonna have to eat this one.

Any room on your team for an eager and passionate college student looking for experience in media?

Sorry. I only take interns for the summer and I currently have one.

Guy I was in a rlshp w/ for 5+ yrs liked 2 dominate sexually. We're over & I know the next guy may want ME 2 take ctrl. b/c I don't have as much exp doing so, I'm nervous af. + I'm in mid 20s. Am I 2 old 2 not know all the "rules" or 2 be scared? How will men respond 2 this? I jus wanna bone!

No one ever knows ALL the rules. Do what you like, ask the other person what he does. Learn each other together and figure out what you BOTH enjoy as a couple.
Rule 1: you should get to do what you like too
Rule 2: sex is as much about pleasing as getting pleased. You're way too focused on what other people want. What do YOU want? As a participant, get a say so too.

My father is obsessed with my getting married more than me. I want to & have prayed about it, but I want to master "self" first. + I've a kid. I'm 25, dad is 58. He says things like "I can't wait for your prince charming to come," etc. How do I tell him to STFU w/o saying it?

Tell him it bothers you and ask him to stop. Maybe he will, maybe he won't. But at least you'll know he's doing it to annoy you if he keeps it up and can respond accordingly.

I have been trying to work things out with an ex for a couple of months now. He was the one that asked for forgiveness and another chance, and I gave him that. Lately, he has been switching up on me. One day he would say I was his 'girl', and the next day he would treat me like a random chick. He g

Doesn't matter what he asked. What he's doing isn't consistent. If he didnt ask you specifically to be in a relationship, you're not "his girl." And he TREATS you different from day to day, he's not serious about getting back together, no matter what he says.

Belle, are some of these questions for real? Like the girl who had a three some with her fiancé and her bestie? Wow! I have a new level of respect for what you do.

100 percent real.

Belle, I've noticed you telling several people that meeting BF's family/friends doesn't really matter. Why not? I always thought meeting impt people in his life shows that you're impt to him.

It doesn't. Something women believe that guys don't. I ask guys "what does it mean to intro a woman to your family?"
Answer: oh, is it supposed to mean something?
It means nothing. His boys will treat a side piece like she's his wife's if it helps their boy. His mother will treat every chick like she matters if it makes her son happy. It means nothing. Go by how he treats you. Period. You're dating those other people.
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Liked by: Kartarajai Singh

Belle, girl I need your help ASAP! My boyfriend and I have been dating for a few months and his birthday is coming up (aug 20), he really wants these sneakers that are way out of my price rang right now, I have no idea what type of gift to get him, any suggestions?

If you ain't got it, you ain't. You don't go broke buying ish you don't need or to impress someone else. If he's into sports, anything sports related. Or electronics. Hard to go wrong there.
I always have trouble with the "what to buy?" Qs. I believe gifts should be personal. I keep a list of things CBW mentions in casual convo that he likes/enjoys and pick from that for bday, anniversary, holiday.

Want a guy but we want to date till later which means when we both live in the same city? I'm scared he will get someone... Should I? We are only 23 and 24 like does a couple years really matter?

If you only want to date him now because you fear he will get someone else, that's ego not interest.
You don't really want to do it, hence why you're not. Forcing it want make you actually want to.

Not op: but I'm confused. In the past whn women write in about their men having opp sex friends who may like the sig other you say as long as the women are respectful to let it be. So how it that diff than the woman writing in about her male friend who is respectful but attracted?

If is obvious he's attracted, it's not respectful. She knows he's attracted.
When it's a guess as to whether the woman is attracted, it's a GUESS. You can't hyperventilate over a guess. Makes you look jealous, clingy and not confident.
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Liked by: Kartarajai Singh

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