What wouldn't you be able to forgive yourself? Or what can't you forgive yourself?
This...is difficult for me.
I blame myself for a lot of things that I really shouldn't.
Something I have a lot of trouble with is being unable to help or protect my loved ones either because I simply don't know what would help them or because I physically can't be by their side at that moment to aid them when I know I could make a difference if I was there.
It's rather torturous and a very painful thing for me to go through. It has driven me to madness before. It's tough to watch the ones you love suffer as you are helpless to ease their pain.
As of right now though...I've slowly come to term with and somewhat forgiven myself for the things I feel that I am responsible for.
It hasn't been easy, that's for sure, and I know it will always linger somewhere inside me...that gnawing voice that whispers that if only...if only...
But I do my best to focus on what I can do. I train hard and work hard in hopes of reducing the chances of being faced with something I can't handle.
I blame myself for a lot of things that I really shouldn't.
Something I have a lot of trouble with is being unable to help or protect my loved ones either because I simply don't know what would help them or because I physically can't be by their side at that moment to aid them when I know I could make a difference if I was there.
It's rather torturous and a very painful thing for me to go through. It has driven me to madness before. It's tough to watch the ones you love suffer as you are helpless to ease their pain.
As of right now though...I've slowly come to term with and somewhat forgiven myself for the things I feel that I am responsible for.
It hasn't been easy, that's for sure, and I know it will always linger somewhere inside me...that gnawing voice that whispers that if only...if only...
But I do my best to focus on what I can do. I train hard and work hard in hopes of reducing the chances of being faced with something I can't handle.
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spuʎ˥