Dan Kim

I think the first thing is thinking about what "bettering yourself" really means to you. It's not like there's one single race that everyone has to run -- you can choose your own path and go your own way. Once you see that you're running your own race and understand that you gotta tackle the world and your life with what's in your own personal toolbox, the entire game starts to look quite different. It's not really a matter of "success" or "failure", but a matter of becoming your own master. Well, at least, that's the view I've come to. You gotta find your own path and your own view, of course.

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Re: anxiety
If your anxiety is out of control, consider talking to doctor or try controlled exposure to build up your tolerance (for example, join a toastmasters club). You might also try changing your point of view: try to remember some stupid thing someone did a year ago. Can you remember anything at all? Odds are you can't. But odds are you can remember that stupid thing you did in primary school and your face turns bright red. But can you remember anything your classmates did? ... See, that's the way it is. No one remember your stupid shit -- they're all too busy thinking about the stupid shit that /they/ did. We're all mostly invisible to other people. There's no need to be anxious -- no one is really judging each other. Hell, we rarely even /notice/ each other. And even when they do -- who cares? What makes them fit to judge you?

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Re: skill
Skill is just result of practice and study over time. No one says you have to be the best, only the best you can be. Asking yourself for more than that is irrational, asking for less is demeaning. Run your own race, but run it hard.

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Re: confidence
Personally, I think the whole self confidence thing is a sham. You don't have to believe in yourself, just believe in the work you're doing. Like I said before, think about what you want -- in concrete terms. Make it into a project -- into a work. Build your habits, skills, and time to advance that work successfully. With your eyes fixed on some distant point external to yourself, you'll suddenly find yourself sure-footed and standing tall, as one only can when investing your life in what you believe to be a worthwhile purpose.

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Finally, it's worthwhile to remember that we're all going to die. Probably painfully, alone, and afraid. And what lies on the other side might be an eternity of screaming madness for all we know. You might as well do everything you can to grab life by the throat and make it pay up. Life is suffering, but that doesn't mean you can't take your revenge: shake that bitch until candy comes out.

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Oh, and don't forget to lift. It's not a joke -- it really helps.

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... I hope that helps, anon. And give a shout when you start lifting. You'll see.

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