I strive to be balanced, in both aspects. I am a realist. I used to be a very, optimistic person. that blinded me, though, and it only caused me hurt to myself, and to the people who care for me.

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I had a happy childhood, and I remember Mama asking me, "how come you are so happy all the time? what's your secret?"

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"I just smile, Mama. I smile and live life."

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giving advice is easy. implementing it in your daily life, and routinely actions, is another step in life that I am currently trying to do.

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a love letter to myself:

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dear nurulhuda,

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you cheerful, bubbly, inspirational, girl you. you are talented, and so loved. honestly. a lot of people love you, and they choose to be loyal to you, because you are so loveable! so don't you dare say you can't love yourself okay, because you do. you do love yourself, and that's not being narcissistic, no, that's being self-appreciative.

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take care of yourself, huda. you only have you in this world, and you are, creating a beautiful life. own it. and then just go with the flow, girl.

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forgive yourself.

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and never abandon the friends who have chosen to stay (because they love you! even though some of them are to shy to say it outrightly, they do love you).

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keep on appreciating the little things in life. keep on smiling. keep on falling in love with strangers. keep on writing. keep on giving. keep on cheering people up. keep on telling people they are beautiful. keep on keepin' on.

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like your best friend from primary school has told you, "you're a keeper!"

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so, let your light shine bright, you adorable girl.

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stay sincere, humble, kind, hardworking, honest, silly, punny, crafty, and remember, God loves you too.

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with all my love,
nurul (in the present).
ps: don't be afraid to break your own rules, sayang. nu-rules. get it?

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"we're breaking all of the rules. even our own rules. and how do we do that? by leaving plenty of room for x quantities" – John Cage