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Possible for a man to love u wanna b with u and stil b doing shady ish with other women? Maybe not sex but secret lunches or inappropriate texts/calls

love is not just a feeling. it's in action, and the action of love counts way more than the feeling of it does. if he feels love, but doesn't act like it, then does it matter?
that said, if he's single, he can do what he wants-- lunches, texts, sex and anything else.
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Liked by: DM Unchinked Armor

I hurt someone I care for. But in the midst of me coming clean with my dirt I found out he had been dishonest with me as well. I admit offense was worst. This is a messy situation but I care very much about him but I think its best we separate, we need to grow, separately. How can I say it

Just like how you said it to me.
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Liked by: Unchinked Armor Kartarajai Singh

I'm dating a guy, just one, I would like to date more, but I think he's insecure. With my job, I attend 'celebrity events' and when I told him that's all he wanted to talk about. I changed the subject but hes not letting go

If he's insecure about what you do, it's not going to work.

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ive been dating this guy off and on for almost 2 yrs. we're both 23 and we spend a lot off time together and im sure he loves me but after looking through his phone I found he still talks to other females about sex. doesn't want any thing just likes to talk... is it worth trying to hold on to?

No. It's on/off for a reason.
Love is nice. But There are ongoing fundamental issues you can't work out with each other, hence the repeated "off". If you're having an "on" period and he's having inappropriate conversations that's an additional problem on top of you obviously not trusting him as you're going thru his phone.
If you're not "on", he can talk to who he wants about whatever he wants as he's single. But it's still a problem of you don't trust him.
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Liked by: FA Courtney Brown

I am a 23 year old female grad student. I have never had a boyfriend. I have only dated a couple of people very briefly. It's hard sometimes to see friends with bfs/engaged/married and I'm unhappily single. My friends ask if I'm dating and the answer is always no. What can I do to find a bf?

If it were only so simple to go and pick one off a shelf!!
Meet people!! Date!! It will happen.
If you'd like hands on help: coachedbybelle at gmail dotcom
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Liked by: C Parker

I realize in general no one gives a shit about your wedding. Now that I'm Married a few friends are engaged and want my help but were ghost when I wa a planning or stressed. Do I play nice and help out be a good friend or give a taste of their own meds?

What do you want to do? Do that.
As someone planning a wedding, I don't want assistance from anyone who's not genuinely invested and has secret grudges
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Liked by: Kartarajai Singh

Husbands bes friend just proposed. I like he and his fiancé but we r not best besties. They just asked us/assumed we are traveling to their destination wedding. Husband agreed I said let's discuss bc don't think we can afford it. How do I convince husband we are not going bc of money and not close t

You need to be operating at a REALLY significant financial deficit to convince hubs out of this one. It is his FRIEND'S wedding-- close or not, but men don't tend to claim friends randomly. And he's already said he's going.
Your financial argument also won't seem valid if you don't know when and where the wedding is and how much it will cost. You're saying "we don't have money!" and don't know the details. Begging off at this point sounds personal.
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Liked by: Kartarajai Singh

but do you agree that their relationship with their SO will be a priority over their relationship with me, their friend?

Yes, entirely.

I recently met a guy who makes a lot of money and no doubt runs into a lot of gold diggers or just women who are easily impressed by material. How do I let him know I want to get close and date without going overboard to show I'm not into his money and interested in him for him.

Be yourself. Show interest in HIM not the lifestyle/money.

I hope this doesn't creep you out, but I'm all about people's energy. When I'm feeling "off" I sometimes watch the DC 2 step video which instantly puts ME in a good mood. You're smiling, happy, just plain living & imagine myself doing the same. Thanks for sharing yourself w/us. Much love boo!

When I'm having a bad day, I watch it too. I LOVE that video.

I've been in relationships where after the breakup, I'd be extremely sad/depressed. Most recent breakup was with guy I was my first love and someone I thought I'd share a life with. It's been months and I haven't cited or felt sad. Is this normal?

You don't have to be depressed after a break up.

I ASKED a question a while ago concerning emotional unavailable friend. I would talk to him for hours being his listening ear but the moment I needed him he was ghost. Well I ended the friendship but he keeps saying how he can't believe me, and how wrong I am. And now wants to be here for me

That's nice. He's allowed to have an opinion that differs from yours. And you don't have to agree with him.

Ended things with a guy a year ago - we were dating and after 6 mos. he just disappeared. Still not really interested in dating. Is this too long a grieving period?

Yes, especially as you're not really grieving and more likely avoiding dating because you don't want to be hurt again.

At the end of a relationships I always completely discontinue talking to ex. Is that not normal? I just don't know how to be friends w/ex.

There's no set rule about whether to be friends or not with an ex. It's what works for you-- or not.

I like old school dating. meeting in person. convo., etc. Seems this is no longer the case. My patience for current trends is short! Am I setting myself up by still looking for this?

No. When people are interested, they still do it ol school.
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Liked by: Aramide Tinubu

Saw your post on instagram about pants. Why don't u wear pants? I stopped wearing tem when I realized I looked better in dresses-I have nice legs and bison but my behind isn't my best feature-

I look better in dresses and have nice legs :-)
Plus I don't like to think too hard about clothes. Dresses are one piece. Put em on and go.

i have great friends. i do. but every single friend always makes their wo-/men a priority when a wo-/man comes along. A guy friend says its natural for folks to put relationship first. In my 30s so have seen it time & time again. What are singles supposed to do? Even new friends eventually date.

You SO should be a priority. That's a given. But that doesn't mean abandon your friends.
Singles are supposed to date and hopefully have enough friends (even boo-ed up ones) to rotate them for their nights off with the SO.
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Liked by: Cathy Kartarajai Singh Jay

Do you really need to have 'the talk' or is it okay for there to be an 'understanding' that we are in a LTR based on actions?

Of you don't have a talk agreeing to a commitment, there's no commitment. You can't assume these things. That is, unless you enjoy confusion.
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Liked by: Cathy Kartarajai Singh 2SheebsDaRappa

There is something sexy about a man that can hold a conversation with you. When I don't get it I'm turned off. Am I being unrealistic?

Nope.

So the guy you're dating doesn't need to meet your friends unless you're in a relationship? So it's never ok for them to meet before then?

He can if you want. But it's not necessary.

Not op re tv/radio-so do you spend free time answering questions on here because you are building up your experience vs really enjoying this/doing it to help others?

You're assuming that any opportunity I may be working on has something to do with advice. Neither one does.
I do this because I like it. I'm not disciplined enough to do things I don't like on a consistent basis for years.

It's been a yr and 9 months since my ex and I parted ways. Not a bad breakup, due to distance. I still consider him a really good friend. At first I wasn't up for friendship and let it be known. He was upset and now that I'm able to be friends he seems he's no longer interested. Should I even try? I

Not if he's demonstrating he's no longer interested.
Timing is everything. Unfortunate that you both weren't on the same page at the same time.

my bff is now living w/ an ex. well he moved in w/ her. now, she's m.i.a. & does this whenever she gets a new guy. she laughs when we bring it up to her & says shes in love. if i feel a certain way, am i hating? should i just fall ALL the way back & see her when i see her?

Some women's priority in life is a relationship and everything else falls by the wayside. She's demonstrated this to you.
Don't make anyone a priority when they have made it clear you're an option.
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Liked by: Charlotte Kartarajai Singh Unchinked Armor

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