If you had it to do all over again would you do it the same…..life that is?
No, not at all.
Although I am cognizant of the fact that we have no control over who our parents are, if God were to allow me to live again, I would insist on one fundamental change: I would want parents that were college educated, well read and able to provide learning opportunities for me that my parents were unable to provide. If this first criteria could not be met then I would prefer to not exist. Life is difficult enough without having parents who are functionally illiterate and unable to actively participate in their children's learning process.
That is the primary change I would request. This is not to say that my parents were bad people but, for example, my mother dropped out of school in the 8th grade, was illiterate and was also an alcoholic who smoked 3 packs of cigarettes her entire adult life until she died from cancer. My father was a hard worker who graduated from high school, but never read books or found it necessary to acquire knowledge and was satisfied reading the local newspaper. He also believed that participation in sports was a waste of time and believed that music was a hobby and should never be taken seriously. He was not amused that I graduated from Berklee College of Music as he honestly believed it to be a complete waste of time. Although I loved my parents I also felt that their negative attitudes (24x7) were indeed a liability for me as well as my brothers and sisters. So instead of complaining, I decided to pick myself up and become self sufficient and live a life in pursuit of knowledge and understanding, free from the negativity of family and friends who seem to be experts at discouraging success with their proclamations of pending doom and failure.
Forcing myself to become independent and self sufficient while never quitting or giving up on my dream to be a guitarist and engineer, resulted in many excellent employment opportunities for me that I am forever grateful for. And yet, I sometimes wonder how much more proficient I might have been if the environment I grew up in was more positive and supportive.
I am certain that many of us have had similar experiences where we play the "what if" game, right? Honestly, I do let these thoughts interfere with my life and mostly I chase them out of my mind whenever they appear because negative thoughts like these are beyond my control and are not productive. But the question posed, forced me to address the issue and I wanted to see if I could write something profound that might help some of my followers who have also have suffered from abuse or difficult and toxic environments. Thanks.
Although I am cognizant of the fact that we have no control over who our parents are, if God were to allow me to live again, I would insist on one fundamental change: I would want parents that were college educated, well read and able to provide learning opportunities for me that my parents were unable to provide. If this first criteria could not be met then I would prefer to not exist. Life is difficult enough without having parents who are functionally illiterate and unable to actively participate in their children's learning process.
That is the primary change I would request. This is not to say that my parents were bad people but, for example, my mother dropped out of school in the 8th grade, was illiterate and was also an alcoholic who smoked 3 packs of cigarettes her entire adult life until she died from cancer. My father was a hard worker who graduated from high school, but never read books or found it necessary to acquire knowledge and was satisfied reading the local newspaper. He also believed that participation in sports was a waste of time and believed that music was a hobby and should never be taken seriously. He was not amused that I graduated from Berklee College of Music as he honestly believed it to be a complete waste of time. Although I loved my parents I also felt that their negative attitudes (24x7) were indeed a liability for me as well as my brothers and sisters. So instead of complaining, I decided to pick myself up and become self sufficient and live a life in pursuit of knowledge and understanding, free from the negativity of family and friends who seem to be experts at discouraging success with their proclamations of pending doom and failure.
Forcing myself to become independent and self sufficient while never quitting or giving up on my dream to be a guitarist and engineer, resulted in many excellent employment opportunities for me that I am forever grateful for. And yet, I sometimes wonder how much more proficient I might have been if the environment I grew up in was more positive and supportive.
I am certain that many of us have had similar experiences where we play the "what if" game, right? Honestly, I do let these thoughts interfere with my life and mostly I chase them out of my mind whenever they appear because negative thoughts like these are beyond my control and are not productive. But the question posed, forced me to address the issue and I wanted to see if I could write something profound that might help some of my followers who have also have suffered from abuse or difficult and toxic environments. Thanks.
