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Do you know any yo mama jokes

Yo Mama is so hairy, The Addams Family thought she was cousin It.
Yo Mama is so dirty, she was kicked out of Red Lobster for bringing her own crabs.
Yo Mama is like a hockey game, she changes her pads every three periods.
Yo Mama is so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.
Yo Mama is so fat, she stepped on a scale and it read to be continued…
Yo Mama is so ugly, she makes onions cry.
Yo Mama is so old, she has Moses in her yearbook.
Yo Mama is so hairy, she was mistaken for a Sasquatch.
don’t get started about Yo Dad😂

How much were you involved in sports at school?

As little as I needed to be haha. I hated sports growing up. I was part of a hockey team for ages and would go on tournaments against other schools with my schools team. But it wasn't because I liked hockey, I just ended up doing it ha. I always loved basketball though.

Raasta koi mil hi jata Tum chale hi nhi

fareehajs8681’s Profile PhotoI hate it here
Meri aik taang naqli hai main hockey ka bht bara khilaadi tha aik din udhay bhai ko meri kisi baat pe ghussa agaya to meri hi hockey se meri taang kay do tukray kar diay lekin dil kay bht achay hain foran haspataal leke gaye ye stick di aur thora kharcha diya😆😆😂😂😂😂
Liked by: Talha Moon Nobody :(

https://ask.fm/MummyAlive/answers/171627648995 - Ice hockey? 🏒 I guessed cricket wouldn't be it, since it's more associated with Commonwealth countries 🤪

redoasis2017’s Profile Photo★ ☮ ♫ †êñå¢ï𵧠†ðmm奙 ▩ ♚ ☻
I'm in the mood for DODGE BALL!!
Where I come from... if you didn't go home with a broken rib, you didn't have fun 🤕

🔥4 likes for 4🔥 Start and I return fair. Trust me :) 🔥4 likes for 4🔥 Start and I return fair. Trust me :)

Asideyoubitch’s Profile PhotoH v p p y ϟ
I don't care, I have so many rewards from people that I won't run out of it in my lifetime.
This year, a new cooking show with Libor Milian should start with 1 episode before Christmas
This session of season 1 will have 35 parts, they will be introduced in it
guests who work with him. In their companies remotely. But we'll see
and other shapes on the screens. For example, high school girls principals Libor Milian, who have already been selected. The daughter of a famous Finnish hockey player and other guests. But what interests you the most is to look at the cuisines of the whole world.But the sponsors of this program will also appear in the show as guests.You will also be able to buy a DVD of this session in E-Shops, where you can see footage from behind the scenes. These dishes will appear in this session, but we will also see new dishes in this session. He has already received several good ratings on TV programs.The program will also be dubbed for some foreign TV channels.

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Why pappu can't dance sala? 💃🕺

nida555555’s Profile PhotoLost
Kiyu ky uski ek tang nakli hai, woh hockey ka boht bara khiladi tha ek din udey bhai ko pappu ki kisi baat pai ghussa aa gya toh pappu ki hockey stick sy hi pappu ki tang ky chaar tukray kery diyai lekin dil ky achy thy foran hospital ly ker gay aur nakli tang lagwa ker di pappu ko.

☯┊Billar, tenis de mesa, futbolito, hockey de mesa, muy entretenidos y algunos considerados deportes; ¿sabes jugar alguno? 🎱

DianaRaquel7u7’s Profile Photo-N®.
Sé jugar futbolito y hockey de mesa. Siempre me ha llamado la atención el billar pero no he tenido la oportunidad de jugarlo.
> Cuando era niña iba a un restaurante donde habían todo tipo de juegos de mesa y la gente se divertía mucho, no era mi caso xd
Billar tenis de mesa futbolito hockey de mesa muy entretenidos y algunos

How often do you drink water?

It varies. I drink when I'm thirsty. I keep a water bottle on my desk so I can take a sip whenever I feel the urge. I'm guessing I drink about two-three liters a day. I generally sneak in some tea in the mornings and beers on hockey nights.
16 cups of water per day? Holy hell. Just me, but that seems like too much. If you view water as something to "get over with" and binge on, then you should maybe re-evaluate what water is and what it does in your body. If you're slamming most of that in the morning, most of it will probably just go right through you. If your piss is totally clear, stop drinking water. It should be light yellow. I prefer to just carry a water jug around with me all day and nurse it, and fill it up several times per day, or down a cup of water if I am feeling particularly thirsty.
I drink a quart of water with breakfast, one with lunch and one with dinner. I drink an additional quart after I work out -- be it in before or after lunch. I drink little else except a large cup of coffee in the morning. After definitely being dehydrated for decades of my life, I cannot remember the last time I actually felt thirsty. It's usually good practice to have a glass of water next to your desk at work. Take sips every so often to keep yourself hydrated throughout the day. Also, since it will fill up your bladder, drinking water regularly while at work allows you to take your eyes off the screen and go for a walk to stretch your legs on the way to the bathroom.
Within an hour of waking up I'm in for about 32 ounces of water then I steadily drink water throughout the day. It's not uncommon for me to have 1 to 2 gallons throughout the day and when summer hits because my job is physical 2 to 4 gallons isn't out of the ordinary with some packets of liquid IV mixed in. I don't drink coffee or energy drinks. The only time I have soda is a ginger ale usually mixed with alcohol. I'll have a nice tea though.
At work waiting at the water cooler, I have 3 mins to get a drink and get back to my desk and take another call. A new trainee has turned up and is filling a 1 litre+ water bottle. After 90 second I think eff this, and head back to my desk with 100ml left in my reused Innocent bottle. 90 minutes later it is lunch, and she is there filling up the bottle again. This time I can wait for a bit of water. I know they say keep hydrated, but this seems to be literally taking the proverbial. I think I heard on one of these Michael Moseley things a doctor saying 'drink when you are thirsty.' Which I do. Are people over hydrating these days? I honestly wouldn't have time to be going to the toilet every half hour, so I don't know where these people are putting it all.

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Liked by: Dylan☕

☯┊Billar, tenis de mesa, futbolito, hockey de mesa, muy entretenidos y algunos considerados deportes; ¿sabes jugar alguno? 🎱

DianaRaquel7u7’s Profile Photo-N®.
Una vez estaba de compra y en esa tienda había un futbolito, ese día me encontraba con mis dos hermanas así que mientras una se media varios cambios de ropa la otra me acompañaba jugando, al principio no entendía nada porque era primera vez que lo jugaba pero le cogimos el ritmo rápido, nos pareció muy genial, entretenido. 🍂
Billar tenis de mesa futbolito hockey de mesa muy entretenidos y algunos

☯┊Billar, tenis de mesa, futbolito, hockey de mesa, muy entretenidos y algunos considerados deportes; ¿sabes jugar alguno? 🎱

DianaRaquel7u7’s Profile Photo-N®.
Hola! Buenas tardes 😁
Son muy divertidos esos juegos cuando los juegas con tus amigos, cuando salía de la escuela nos quedamos jugando futbolito en la tienda fuera la escuela, eran unas risas y diversión interminable hasta que se nos acabaran los pesos jajaja
El hockey me parese que si lo llegué a jugar igual con mis amigos pero ya en un ambiente más tranquilo 😅
El billar, sé cómo se juega por los videojuegos de celular y todo eso, pero nunca lo he jugado de forma real, no he tenido la oportunidad de ir aunque por donde vivo tampoco es que haya muchos 😅
Y sobre el tenis de mesa nunca había escuchado de eso, no sé cómo es, pero me supongo que es como el tenis normal? 🤔 Ese juego para que veas si es desconocido para mí, quizá lo haya visto alguna vez pero no sabía que así se llamaba.
Un saludo!😁

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Liked by: Luis -N®.

☯┊Billar, tenis de mesa, futbolito, hockey de mesa, muy entretenidos y algunos considerados deportes; ¿sabes jugar alguno? 🎱

DianaRaquel7u7’s Profile Photo-N®.
Me ha hecho gracia futbolito, no sabía que se le llamaba así allí JAJAJA, aquí le llamamos futbolín. Sé medio jugar a todos, al que algo mejor es al hockey de mesa, el ping-pong soy nefasta, pero la gracia es pegar raquetazos por pegarle.

When you recieve any good news, do you usually do something to celebrate? 🥳 Doesn't matter how big of a deal you make it. For example, I went out earlier today to get my favorite pizza upon learning that I got a job for the summer 😊

TobbeAsks’s Profile PhotoTobbe
Yes I do. As an example, last Sunday I played two gigs and both audiences enjoyed our music. To celebrate, sunday evening I walked down town the the Irish pub and enjoyed one beer and some popcorn while watching a hockey game. I do little things to treat myself each week.
If it is something major like my wife's heart attack, I will do small things to help her and once she has recovered, I plan a special event to celebrate her recovery and good health. In a few weeks we will attend a Paul McCartney concert. My wife loves Beatle music and I know the concert will generate unforgettable memories for both of us.

This might sound like a dumb question but how do you make friends when you're new in town/neighborhood? My fam&I recently moved into this neighborhood and Idk anyone. It'd be weird to just approach people out at the park or knock on their front door like 'hi am new in town wanna be friends xoxo'

Try BumbleBFF if you’re comfortable w meeting strangers (obviously follow basic safety like bring someone with you, tell someone where you’re going and when you expect to be back, meet in public, don’t tell them where you live etc).
Sign up for classes!! Art, photography, dance, yoga, spin, Pilates etc.
Join a sports team, there are lots of adult soccer, baseball, hockey leagues that are “just for fun” aka not tryna be pro,, but just tryna have fun + meet people.
What I also like to do is go through local hashtags on IG and see where people hang out like; local parks, coffee shops, restaurants, bars etc.
(I usually just do this to find cool new places to go solo or w my boyfriend, LOL.)
But you could try following new people, talk to them/DM, make friends etc.

Welche Sportarten hast du bisher in deinem Leben ausgeübt und welche war deine liebste?🏋🏼‍♀️⛹🏼🤾🏼‍♂️🧘🏽‍♀️🏄🏼‍♀️

Wenn Schulsport auch dazu zählt:
Badminton/ Federball, Völkerball, Fußball, Basketball, Volleyball, Hockey, Weitwurf, Weitsprung, Hochsprung, Sprint 50m/ 75m/ 100m, Ausdauerlauf 1000m/ 2000m/ 5000m, Staffellauf, Kugelstoßen, Trampolinsprung, Schwimmen, Brennball, Turnen an Reck, Barren, Bock,
Ansonsten noch Tischhockey, Tischfußball, Minigolf, Billard, Darts, Tischtennis, Kegeln/ Bowling.
Sind zumindest alle, die mir gerade einfallen.
Volleyball, Badminton, Bowling, Billard, Tischfußball oder Sprint fand ich richtig gut und schlecht war ich darin auch nicht unbedingt
Liked by: L.♡ Nutella

Do you share your birthday with any famous people?

Upton Sinclair - American writer 9-20-1878
Red Auerbach - Coach of Boston Celtics 9-20-1917
Sophia Loren - Actress 9-20-1934
Guy Lafleur - NHL hockey player 9-20-1951
John Travares - NHL hockey player 9-20-1990
George R.R. Martin - Novelist 9-20-1948
Jon Bernthal - Actor 9-20-1976
Ainsley Earhardt - T.V. Personality and writer. 9-20-1976
Gary Cole - Actor 9-20-1956
Kimbal Musk - Venture Capitalist, Restaurateurs 9-20-1972
Liked by: Rose Shaireen

Liebe Charlotte, welches war dein erstes Eishockeyspiel? Erinnerst du dich an Dieses? Was hat dich so fasziniert, dass du Fan des Sports geworden bist?

ShortMan679’s Profile PhotoMalleus Maleficarum
es war ungefähr 1971 oder 72.
der MERC war gerade aus der bundesliga abgestiegen und es verloren sich nur ca 1500 fans im offenen eisstadion. wir waren neu in der stadt, mein vater meinte, wir sollten verschiedene (sport)veranstaltungen besuchen. das war sehr außergewöhnlich.
die wenigen leute machten riesenrabatz. das hockey war damals noch sehr technisch betont, da saßen die pässe und in sekunden änderte sich das spielgeschehen und plötzlich war die andere mannschaft am drücker. auch die gesänge im stadion haben mich sehr begeistert, die waren schon ziemlich ausfallend lol.
von da an ging ich immer hin, aber allein. meine mutter fand das iwann zu gefährlich und wollte es mir verbieten. da war die hölle los und ich habe das nicht akzeptiert. ich ging einfach trotzdem und da hat sie aufgegeben
in meiner heißen phase war ich auf jedem home und auch away game. mein leben war eishockey und diese mannschaft. die wurde auch besser, stieg wieder auf, wurde zum ersten mal deutscher meister und lief im schwarzen anzug auf.
heute gehe ich nicht mehr, weil jedes jahr neue leute dort sind, weil ich alleine hingehen müsste und es ist für mich gesundheitlich sehr anstrengend.
was sport angeht bleibt es die große liebe.

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What would be your ideal lifestyle?

nai269549’s Profile Photoʟᴇɪᴀɴ ♕
Living alone, taking my time with life. I always imagined being a stay at home wife😅 Apartment in a safe part of the city, over a coffee shop. happy kids, happy marriage, happy me. enough money to be comfortable but not so much I get stupid with it. A job I love.
Living in the burbs, making 80-120k a year, household 150-200k, and be able to afford for my future kids the opportunities I never got. Who knows, maybe I could have been a world renown lacrosse or hockey player if I was exposed to different opportunities when I was younger. Maybe chess master of the world, who knows.
Ideal life? As in unattainable, I would live life as a musician and continue my education until I was satisfied with myself.
If I could have an ideal life it would fit this plan. Finish college and get a job. Nothing fancy just something in an office with a steady income and good people around me.
Build a house. I know exactly what kind it would be to. Its an eco friendly DOMED HOUSE. They have a lot of space and are cheap to have built. I think they are awesome. Domed House Just enjoy life. I'd surf reddit and go out and do stuff. My day to day wouldn't change much I just want something to call my own and the ability to support myself in the long term.
I'd have a wife that loved me unconditionally and a couple of sons that did the same. Wife (If there is such a thing) would be my soul mate ♥,fighting by my side and helping me along the way. Then I'd find the true nature of God and he'd accept my apology for being a bad person in my younger years. I'd also help to destroy the uprising of slaves today before I died, with absolute peace, joy and love in my heart. I'd want to live like a king while remembering that I am only a man who loves people but is too hurt in my younger years to show it. I'd want to live convincing people love one another. Consistent schedule every day, a close friend to live with me to remind me to do big important stuff (ie remember your doctor's appointment today) not take care of me, just help me keep my mind on track. A job where I dont deal with customers and I can work with my hands and be consistently doing something. In an area with a low tempo speed of life, in a small house that I can easily keep track of. I can understand wanting to raise children in the suburbs--safe streets and other kids and all that--but only to a point. Mostly because I absolutely loathe suburbs, especially the ones with rows upon rows of near-identical houses. It's nightmarish. I need space and nature; being surrounded by buildings all the time just makes me feel deeply unhappy.

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ꜱʜᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜰᴜᴄᴋɪɴɢ ᴍᴏᴜᴛʜ ᴏʀ ꜱᴏᴋᴏʟ ᴡɪʟʟ ꜱʜᴜᴛ ɪᴛ ꜰᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ.

dagr1nder4’s Profile Photo⊹ S O K O L
‣〚Nᴏᴍʙʀᴇ “ʀᴇᴀʟ”〛
Dimitri Alekseeva (Дими́трий Алексеева).
Sokol, Dima, Commie.
━━━─── • ───━━━
Saint Petersburg Bombers (formalmente), 50 Blessings, FBI.
Amplio conocimiento en el manejo de armas blancas y de fuego. Años de frustración le han provocado una sed de sangre enorme, la cual lo hace alguien muy violento y físico, teniendo el perfil perfecto de un “mensajero”. Sumamente ágil, usar únicamente sus puños no es un problema.
━━━─── • ───━━━
Es un joven de complexión musculosa, 26 años y 1.87 de estatura. Tiene ojos azules grisáceos, cabello rubio oscuro y piel clara repleta de lunares. Tiene algunas cicatrices poco sanadas ubicadas en el puente de la nariz, en la comisura derecha de su labio y varias en ambas muñecas.
Viste una chaqueta de mezclilla adornada con un parche y un monograma de “C”, debajo lleva una sudadera roja con el logo del equipo al que solía pertenecer, en la parte trasera está estampado el apellido “Козак” y el numero 10 debajo de este, zapatos deportivos y pantalones negros. Es común verlo sin la chaqueta y, aunque no es visible, usa una collar del cual cuelga una ficha de casino, probablemente un recuerdo del primero que robó.
Al realizar un trabajo se pone una máscara de halcón y guantes quirúrgicos de color azul.
Demostrando un gran desempeño en el hockey y en la ingeniería mecánica, muchos podrían describir a Sokol como un talento malgastado. Su inteligencia y poco temor lo han llevado a lograr cosas buenas… pero también malas. En su mayoría malas. Es un joven que busca divertirse y tener buenas experiencias, esto llevándolo a adoptar un comportamiento autodestructivo. Peleas, alcohol, violencia, auto flagelo, y la tendencia de exponerse a situaciones peligrosas e incluso suicidas; todo esto es tomado a la ligera por él.
Le gustan las fiestas y es muy social, despreocupado y aparentemente alegre; pero en la mayoría del tiempo la pasa solo. Tiene su lado sarcástico y le gusta molestar amistosamente a la gente de vez en cuando.
Su condición lo hace periódicamente cortar cualquier contacto con la gente, ya sea por miedo de representar un peligro para personas que le importen o simple necesidad de aislarse.
[ . . . ]

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ꜱʜᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜰᴜᴄᴋɪɴɢ ᴍᴏᴜᴛʜ ᴏʀ ꜱᴏᴋᴏʟ ᴡɪʟʟ ꜱʜᴜᴛ ɪᴛ ꜰᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ

Ya te puedes pasar a leer una nueva entrada, sé que tardé mucho tiempo en escribirla, y espero que la disfrutes https://cronicasdelmotor.wordpress.com/2022/01/30/kimi-raikkonen/

molinillo_o_paraguas’s Profile PhotoPingui
Me da mucha alegría que hayas vuelto a publicar porque extrañaba tus publicaciones.
No tengo muchos conocimientos de la fórmula 1, sin embargo me pareció interesante el señor Raikonnen, al parecer siempre fue algo indisciplinado desde su infancia, el padre hacia esfuerzos sobrehumanos teniendo 3 empleos y el dejó la actividad de hockey sobre hielo para no levantarse temprano (yo igual odio madrugar 😄).
También me llamó la atención que en Sudamérica siempre hay una visión idealizada de los países nórdicos (allá el servicio militar es obligatorio, acá en Chile no), también me causó risa cuando el amigo de él lo delató y fue castigado por culpa de su amigo jajajaja, no había oído hablar de él , me pareció todo un personaje y su carácter y forma de ser es bastante particular, me alegra el hecho que haya dejado esos malos hábitos y haya formado una familia.
Con gusto esperaré una nueva publicación tuya, cuidate mucho.

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Ya te puedes pasar a leer una nueva entrada sé que tardé mucho tiempo en

Do girls like funny guys?

I dont know. Not my fucking jokes, at least. I dated a girl once. We were about to watch something on the tv when I stumbled across a paralympic hockey game. She didn't like that at all. Every time someone got tackled, you could see this look of concern in her eyes. I told her to fucking relax. I told her it's the fucking Paralympics. It's not like they are going to be fucking paralysed twice.
I haven't heard from her ever since. Maybe she was into more sensitive guys.

ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴏꜰ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜱᴡᴇᴇᴛ ᴍᴀᴍᴀ— ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ʙᴇ ᴀ ʜᴇʀᴏ— ᴊᴜꜱᴛ SHUT THE FUCK UP ᴀɴᴅ ꜱᴛᴀʏ ᴅᴏᴡɴ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜɪꜱ ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ ᴏᴠᴇʀ SOON.

dagr1nder4’s Profile Photo⊹ S O K O L
▸〚ᴅᴀᴛᴏꜱ ᴀᴅɪᴄɪᴏɴᴀʟᴇꜱ〛
- Tiene un metabolismo acelerado. A veces se permite servirse comida dos o tres veces más.
- Abandonó el hockey sin dudar, pero aún es un deporte que le apasiona y ve partidos todos los fines de semana.
- Tiene una relación bastante cercana con Dallas y Joy; ambos miembros del grupo delictivo.
- Por su estilo de vida, ha tenido que presentarse con muchos nombres. El predilecto solía ser “Aleksandr Lobanov”. Hay ocasiones donde lo sigue usando.

- A veces se le puede atrapar hablando solo. Menciona mucho los nombres “Leroy” y “Barney”, como si conversara con estos personajes.
- Es incapaz de hablar de sus propios problemas, pero siempre escucha los de otras personas.
- Cuando está ansioso, suele acariciar o rascar las cicatrices en su muñeca de forma inconsciente.
- Es bisexual. La homosexualidad está severamente desaprobada y es castigada en Rusia, por lo que creció acomplejado, odiando lo que es.

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ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴏꜰ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜱᴡᴇᴇᴛ ᴍᴀᴍᴀ ᴅᴏɴᴛ ʙᴇ ᴀ ʜᴇʀᴏ ᴊᴜꜱᴛ SHUT THE FUCK UP ᴀɴᴅ ꜱᴛᴀʏ ᴅᴏᴡɴ ᴀɴᴅ

¿Eres persona de bailar o de barra en el bar?

Ni una cosa ni la otra.
Yo cuando salía con amigos prefería dar un paseo, sentarnos en algún banco a charlas con un refresco o bebida energética y, como mucho entrar a algún bar, sentarnos todos en una mesa y bebernos una cerveza mientras charlábamos.
Si había un futbolín jugábamos y, sino pues íbamos a algún sitio donde hubiese billar o hockey de aire para echarnos unas risas.
Me gusta quedar de tranquis.
Liked by: Draken Xion

|| Mm, pues Se llama Sergei Kozak, tiene 25 y es ex jugador de hockey, pero abandonó su carrera para convertirse en un criminal que roba bancos y cosas más grandes. Es muy energético y vigoroso, y aunque de un poco de miedo, es amable dentro de lo que cabe ✨

dagr1nder4’s Profile Photo⊹ S O K O L
[ Oh ya veo, suena muy interesante~
Déjame pensar cómo podrían conocerse... Puede que Mei consiga ser su roomie y no sepa a qué se dedica hasta que empiece a indagar poco a poco en su vida o que se lo tope de casualidad en algún sitio al que él vaya a robar o algo por el estilo, qué piensas? Si tienes otra idea me avisas encantaría leerla 😊 ]

What is a major thing that attracts you to a person?

Looks are somewhat important but intelligence and interest in history/politics. My boyfriend is not, objectively, the best looking man I've ever been with. But I think he's handsome and his MIND is incredible and keeps me interested and loving him.
Personally, physically attractive guys are purely just that. What really attracts me to a person is what they do to keep themselves interested in something, continually learning (in some form), and improving themselves. They need to have their own life and goals essentially.
First they have to be physically attractive to me, which means nice body and great smile. But to keep that attraction they need to have a good sense of humor, be able to keep up conversation, and be kind and compassionate. If any of these traits are missing, physical or non physical, it's a no-go.
Sincerity - I like guys that say what they mean and mean what they say Hobbies - things he's passionate about that haven't anything to do with his job Likes animals - I'm a big animal person so he's gotta love them too! Visual stuff... Ah... Dimples and a cheeky smile are such a YES, so is slightly curly/textured hair. I love nice arms too. A mature, refined sense of style is also a big turn-on.
Athleticism. This must be a throwback to my cavewoman ancestry or whatever, but I love jocks. Something about strength, speed, quick reflexes, and control and coordination over their bodies. When I watch my boyfriend play hockey I turn into a puddle.
I find a lot of guys cute, but to me, attraction is being drawn to them more than a simple comment that they're goodlooking. When I see someone be kind with genuineness and confidence, that's when I really notice.
Certain aspects of their personality. Mostly being very independent, but very socially capable. Having a lot of friends, as well as having a lot of hobbies and interests that he's super into. Not being clingy!! I can't stand it when they treat me like royalty or anything along those lines. I almost like it when they're more valuable than me, so to speak, within the social situation that I meet him in. I guess in a way, I'm attracted to power. Not money, but just the power. There are plenty of instances where someone has power over me without being rich. It can be a measure of success, but mostly because I grew up really poor. There are some aspects of a lower class upbringing that I don't think a child should be exposed to. I honestly wouldn't pursue a relationship with someone if I think we wouldn't be able to provide a middle class income for our child. Personality and money. If you're below average and have both of those things, it's not a deal breaker.
Good self-esteem. I hate self-depreciation so much, and people who fish for compliments. I was kinda-sorta with someone like that and it was annoying. Really good self-esteem (but not arrogance , of course) is really almost a turn-on.

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How would you describe your personality? 🙂

I am shy at first when I meet someone, but once I get to know someone better and comfortable with them, I can chat their ear off and become annoying. I talk a lot…..
I am athletic. I like to play sports. Especially badminton, shinny (unprofessional hockey), volleyball and ultimate frisbee.
I am cheerful and positive. I like to talk to people, compliment people, and sometimes I am too positive and people look at me weirdly when I compliment them too much.
I am kind and respectful. I like to treat others with respect, and treat them how I want to be treated. I respect everyone, no matter their race, culture, ethnicity, religion, etc. I’m shy when you first meet me but once I’m used to you I’m going to act my normal self and keep you laughing 24/7.
I’m very sweet and kind. I help others when they need it and be here for everyone that needs me. If you need something important I will make sure I try my best to get it for you.
I love to sing. Singing keeps me calm and makes me happy.
I smile a lot. I love to smile and it lets others know you can get through the day if you just smile. Introverted but highly talkative if you make the first move; perfectionistic; straight-A student with not a lot of common sense, unfortunately; bookworm; musician; daydreamer; self-conscious; absolutely hopeless romantic! Long dark brown hair—if the light hits it just right, you can see my natural coppery highlights. Unfortunately, the light rarely hits it just right. My hair isn't naturally straight (I flat-iron it), but it's not very pretty when I air-dry it (as in it's straightish on one side and curly-wavy on the other side). Dark brown, slightly diamond-shaped eyes with long eyelashes (the bottom ones are very long, but the top ones tend to go out more than curl up, so you can't really tell). I've been told my eyes are pretty three times and once I was told I had “fish scale" dark lines in my irises, how to describe my nose lol. My lips are full and my teeth are straight from two years of braces. Both sides of my family have big teeth, so I have big teeth too. I have an oval face, thick eyebrows that aren't really that dark, and not really any cheekbones that stand out. I look really good in maroon/burgundy, olive green, and navy blue. When I wear makeup, I keep it natural-looking and don't wear heavy, bold eyeshadow or the “brick brows". If you need someone to bring you down from your high horse then I’m here. I’m the guy in the group who presents the problems to a plan or project so they don’t do anything rash. Switches between “morose, depressing and dour.” , “Unhinged, Sadistic and Evil.” and “Completely amicable and affable.” I have no Idea which one will come out when I talk to you.

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Shout out bhaij Raha cause I feel alone , 25 years of my life. Exhausted and tired of people. Aries hoon , seedha hoon. And someone you can call at late night as well. Quick replies too. Shayad ziada sensitive bhi hoon. Looking for new people lets see how it goes?

meri aik taang nakli hei mein hockey ka bohout barra khilari tha aik din udday bhai ko meri kissi baat pe ghussa aagaya aur meray hi hockey se meri taang ke dou tukray kar diye

Air hockey o pinball.

El air hockey junto al futbolín me recuerda a la sala de recreativos a la que iba con el bae, sus hermanos y con un amigui que me invitaba a todas las partidas que echábamos, además de a algún refresco y a algo de picar teniendo yo dieciséis años.
Qué morriña...
Air hockey o pinball
Liked by: Emilio Usuriaga Xion

Danielle is your girl crush and Darren is your boy crush but does it bother you that they both know you fancy them? Are you not embarrassed?

You appear to have a very very very very high level of interest in this lol
both parties may find what you write to be a bit of a shock
but is it correct/
what evidence do you have ?
How do you know that it's not Dannielle and Darren who want to ...ahem....make out !!!
moi EMBARASSED ????? hasn't happened since my skirt flicked up playing school hockey back in the day

Quel est votre sport favori ?

Soccer!! I used to play soccer SOOO much when I was younger. I have stopped for a really long time though, I almost never play it and it makes me kinda sad. I'm planning on doing something about that once winter ends though. I'm really good at goaltending but I'm sure I'm going to need a lot of practice to regain my skills. I've only recently started getting into watching soccer. I used to watch basketball and have watched hockey all my life though. Love those sports too.
I grew up in Alabama, which has no professional team. The university teams (especially Auburn University & University of Alabama) are the highest level, and I actually like watching them better. Going to a game live is really fun. The cheerleaders actually lead cheers with signs and the "mic man" (male cheerleader who uses a PA so the student section can hear and cheer along). Also, I like the halftime shows better (which they don't show on TV because of music copyrights issues) because I'm a former marching band geek.
Play: Basketball. It's basically the only thing I know how to play at a high enough level. (Too skinny to play football most of my life, hate soccer, too weak to actually play baseball, and chose track & field over playing volleyball.) Plus getting a neat little dopamine rush when scoring a lot or doing really impressive things like defensive stops or pinning someone's layup on the backboard, that's also nice.
It's a sport that's still in it's infancy. We're still figuring out how the hell it's all going to work in the long term. I like following along with a sport as it goes through it's "wild west" phase. It can be a complete shit show sometimes, but it's also a mad crucible where we're figuring what actually works in combat sports.
It's a draw between AFL and basketball. Both to play and watch on tv - I don't really like going to either of the games though. AFL has too much of the crowd screaming at the umpires about what call to make whenever there is a tackle and it's always miraculously the call that will give the home team possession of the ball. Basketball is kind of spoiled by the announcer constantly trying to hype up the crowd. I think tennis is my favourite sport to watch live.
I don't like playing sports or watching them, but if I have to, I'll watch hockey or basketball because they move quickly. Hockey in particular. Watching a full football, soccer, or baseball game is like torture to me. I mean, if we're talking less-conventional sports, I used to be good at archery and skeet shooting. And I'd rather watch some kind of auto racing than any ball-based sport. And there's nothing like taking a nap to a game of golf on a lazy sunday.

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What is paradise for you?

nai269549’s Profile Photoʟᴇɪᴀɴ ♕
My paradise is an empty hockey rink. I strap on my skates and head to the ice. I bring out a few pucks with me and fire shots till my wrists shake. I have no stress and no worries when I'm out there. A smile on my face the entire time. I focus on the sounds: the sounds of my skates ripping into the ice, the sound of my stick making contact with the puck, the sound of a few ringers of the posts or the crossbar, the sound when I occasionally miss the net and hit the glass ;), the silence when the puck is absorbed in the netting. There is nothing greater to me. Alas, with a broken ankle it will be awhile till I hit the ice again...
The most peaceful I think I've ever been was drinking beer in a hot tub on the deck/balcony of a log cabin in the mountains overlooking a valley and the glittering lights of the town below. Crisp chill night, not terribly cold, but cold enough that steam rises from your skin as you raise your arm out of the water. Smell of pine, grass, wildflowers, and earth in the air. No sound except the animals, and the bubbling of the hot tub.
I live in a small town. A five minute walk gets me to a pine tree forest on a hill. Paradise for me is walking there in the early morning when my favorite niece is visiting. We have a flask of coffee, bacon sandwiches, cappuccino muffin. We spread out a blanket in a little hollow in the forest, on a soft bed of pine needles. We lie down, staring out over the rolling hills and discuss anything and everything, but mostly our talks are Tolkien related. Pure bliss.
The top of a mountain, mid December, with a light snow falling at 24 F and the whole day ahead of me on my freshly waxed skis. My cheeks sting from the cold and I can feel the snow melting on my lips. My eyes search for my perfect line downward, and my hands grasp my poles tighter in anticipation for the inevitable adrenaline rush that will warm me through and through. The whoosh of my skis through the four inches of fluffy fresh powder is overpowered by the cacophony of wind that assaults my ears and chills them to their numbing point. After racing down the mountain, I slide onto a lift and give my shaking legs a rest. My hands slide out of my gloves and gladly accept the hot air I breath through them as I prepare to do it all over again for the rest of the day.
The first thing is the scent. The delicious salty, ocean smell. Accompanies by the smell of fresh vegetation. I'm relaxed sitting in a chair. Just my significant group of friends. Laughter between all of us. You look out to see a deserted beach. It's ours for miles. The noon day sun is high in the air. There are birds flying, fish jumping, insects bustling. A cold beer in my right hand. The ocean is a crystal blue unimaginable except to those who have seen it.

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Which sport is the most exciting to watch?

iWillSpamYouAsk’s Profile PhotoSpam Ask
Not even that big a hockey fan, but I've been to my share of NHL games, and hockey live is fucking amazing. There are fights, real bloody, teeth getting knocked out, feelings gettin hurt fights. And the players have to sit in timeout in a glass cube if they get a penalty and all the fans are drunk and fuck with them. And you can actually see the puck in person vs tv where it's hard to follow. Theres a damn Zamboni between periods and the sound of the players skates on the fresh ice is very satisfying. Only downside is if 1 player scores three goals, it's a hat trick and everybody throws their hat on the ice. What if I like my hat wtf
Almost all major sports will get tie d for most entertaining. But as a non-American,I never understood some American sports having 15 minutes of action and 30 minutes of nothing. Some people might get triggered because the OP asked for real sports, but high level Dota 2(esports) has given me the most chills out of any other thing I've watched. And the longer the game goes, the better it gets.
Baseball is awesome to watch. All you need to do is put some money down on the game and you'll be glued to your tv. Not even a significant amount of money, you can throw $1 down and just having that little bit of investment to actually watch the game makes it a great afternoon.
Average Game time for the 2017 Boston Red Sox was 3:20. While around 15 minutes higher than league average, not really that close to 4-5 hour range. They did have 16 games over 4 hours, so about 10 percent. Of those 3 were over 5 hours, and 2 of those over 6 hours(6:00 and 6:05). So there do tend to be some longer games, because there is technically no timer on the game, but they are fairly rare.
That's the beauty of it -- you can invest as much or as little time as you want into it. Football fans (and I love football, too) have only that once-a-week window to drink an inappropriate amount of beer and curse the tv. Baseball fans can do it pretty much solidly for an entire 6 months.
Redzone NFL Football. Used to be the regular single game at a time but I got super spoiled by seeing every single score, highlights as they happen live, and basically the most exciting thing going on in any given game for 3 hours straight.
Cricket. Like most sports, it's almost impossible to enjoy unless you grow up watching it, but for me, there's nothing better than watching one of the worlds best batsmen duck under a potentially lethal ball delivered from one of the worlds quickest bowlers. My second choice is the Tour de France. There aren't many sports where you see a group of people push themselves to breaking point, and are able to watch them drop out one by one as they reach their physical limit. It only happens a few days each year, on the high mountain climbs, but it's an extraordinary and harsh test of endurance. The mountains seperate the contenders like no other element of any other sport.

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