Dr. Andrew

Ask @LSLLoveAdvice

Sort by:



We love him dearly and don’t want to upset him or harm our relationship. How should we handle this?

If your nephew knows your beliefs, and it's likely he does, he is disrespecting you and your husband. Any guest in your house should honor your beliefs. When they are somewhere else, they can do as they please. Sit with him and tell him how much you love him. But also tell him that you would appreciate his respect for your beliefs. They are welcome in your home as long as they sleep in separate rooms. Then the choice is theirs.

Our nephew would like to stay with us when he comes to visit. He lives about 2 hrs away and has some business. I said wonderful until I found out he wants to bring his girlfriend. I know they are both adults, but we are Christians and don’t believe they should be sleeping together.

see next answer

My wife and I are both 50. All of a sudden she is short tempered, cries easily, and doesn’t want anything to do with me. When I ask her what’s wrong, she just walks away. I suggested going to couple’s therapy, but she said I just need to change. Any words of wisdom?

Your wife needs to see her doctor. At her age the most likely culprit is menopause especially if this is sudden onset behavior. She is also probably having hot flashes and having her sleep interrupted. This is a fairly common complaint surrounding the change of life that women go through. There certainly are other possible causes. Just be supportive and ask if there's anything she needs. DON'T mention that you think she's going through a change, or you will only add fuel to the fire.

Related users

What do you think is the best gift for wedding?

Check their website and see what they are registered for. That way you know you will be giving them something they really want.

My two close friends are having a social media battle over this girl. Everybody else thinks it’s funny. I think it’s stupid and I want them to stop.They tell me to mind my own business but I think as a close friend of both I shouldn’t let them continue to be stupid. How do other people handle this?

First, stay out of the middle. You will only have the fingers pointed at you. As the saying goes, you can't fix stupid. Let them do their little childish battle and it will eventually burn out.

There is this girl in my AP history class who is super smart and super good looking. I can’t get her out of my mind. I asked around and she’s not going with anybody. I’d like to go out with her but I think she’s way out of my league. How do I get past this?

This is particularly hard since you don't even think you are in her league. If you truly believe that, you should not ask her. But my suggestion is you just swallow hard and go for it. You may just be very surprised how it turns out ... hopefully for the good. You just have to put on your big boy pants and deal with it!

What is the appropriate dress if my bf invited me to see his parents? I can’t go by my mom because she embarrasses everyone with what she wear

Ask your bf to see some family pics. That way you will see how his mother dresses for different occasions as well as the colors she likes. If you haven't already, brush up on your manners. That will make a huge impression on both of them.

My closest friend cheated on his gf and I found out about it. I don’t want to be friends with him anymore. I think he sucks and I told him so. He says it’s not my job to judge. Am I wrong?

It may not be your job to judge, but it certainly is your right to disconnect from someone you don't find trustworthy anymore. Before you take that step, make sure you have all the facts about the situation because once you pull the plug on the relationship, it will be very hard to reconnect.

My gf’s parents recently divorced. My mom is single and started going out with her father. This really creeps us out. I told her she needs to knock it off but she won’t listen to me. Do you think I’m being too hard on her?

First, you are still trying to process the loss of your intact family. That is hard under any circumstances. But you can't tell your mom what to do. Your mom is probably trying her best to keep some happiness in her life. As hard as it is for you, try to let her have some happiness. Yes, it's a little awkward, especially if either you and your gf or mom and his dad break up, but you will all find your way.

Is there ever a way to get over being cheated on? My husband got drunk at an office party and seriously kissed one of the women who was also drunk. He did not hide it from it and told me about it the next morning. I feel betrayed. What do I do now?

Being cheated on is one of the hardest things to get over, and using alcohol as an excuse is lame. At least it was just a kiss, and at least he fessed up right away. It will take you awhile to heal. The only way the healing is possible is if there are no more incidents like that. The two of you may need to see a marriage counselor to help you process what happened. Be patient with yourself and don't make any impulsive emotional decisions. That never works out well. You are going to have to decide if this is a pattern or just a one-and-done thing.

When will your app be available for Android?

We are implementing user suggestions into a new and improved version for both IOS and Android.

This girl and me have been hanging out. My parents are freaked because she has two moms instead of the usual. I’m cool with it, and I think they are super. What should I say to my parents?

Your parents are traditionalists, so they really don't understand. All you can do is ask them to keep an open mind. Suggest that all of you meet for a barbecue. That's a nice casual atmosphere. They may never agree with the same sex relationships, but at least they will have a chance to meet the women and probably find, like you did, that they are really great people. They are simply trying to protect you, but they are going about it with antiquated ideas.

Me and my gf wanted to wait to announce our engagement. Her parents jumped the gun and announced it ahead of us. We are furious. We are thinking about calling off the engagement for now just to get even. Any other advice?

Don't call it off just to spite them. That's just punishing yourselves. What the two of you need to do is to sit down with her parents and tell them how you really feel about what they just did. You can certainly mention how they have violated your trust in them. You can also explain to them why it was so important to wait until the two of you were ready. Be absolutely sure that all the facts are as you think they are before going to them. They were probably just really, really excited, but that's just an explanation and not an excuse. Tell them what you need them to do in the future, but do it politely.

What makes someone attractive?

As the old saying goes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What is attractive to one person may not be attractive to another. In fact, it may be a complete turnoff to another. Here's a perfect example. One female may find a male with a hard athletic build and a super ab six pack a real turn on, while another may say that's way too macho for her and prefer the less apparent skinny jeans look. Some men like a woman with a nicely shaped booty, while others think junk in the trunk is a turnoff. Variety is the spice of life.
Liked by: Chianna Dunblazier

I can’t believe what this other girl said about me on FB. It’s all lies. I don’t know what to do. If I respond, it seems like I’m being defensive, but if I don’t, the lies just keep going. What do I do?

You are correct that if you don't respond, many will then read the posts as the truth. If you protest too much, people will just think you are covering up. So, just keep your response short, sweet, and to the point. Don't do any personal attacks, because that will only prolong the conversation. Also, only respond once. After that, let the lies die out.

Who pays for what in a wedding? I keep hearing different things. I think my parents are getting upset with everything coming up. I’m not sure if my bf’s parents are supposed to pay for anything.

You can certainly go out and buy an etiquette book. It will list all the traditional ways of handling a wedding. But my opinion is that when it comes to weddings, one size does NOT fit all. Unless it has to do with adhering to cultural norms, many parents contribute to the best of their abilities. Many even split it 50/50 if they are in a financial position to do so. Weddings are supposed to be very happy occasions, but they often become battle grounds, particularly with regard to money. You and your partner have to be respectful about the money situation.

Is there anyway to tell for sure if this girl is legit. We’ve been talking online. How do I check her out without anybody thinking I’m weird?

This topic has come up before many times. There are online services that do a very good job of investigating someone's background. If you have concerns or doubts, this would be something good to do for yourself. It would put your mind at ease if everything works out, or it would prevent you from making a big mistake. It's not weird at all. It called making good decisions based on facts.

Me and this guy are gay. Nobody at school thinks anything about it but it seems to bother my partner. How do I handle it with him. He seems embarrassed.

Since you are more comfortable, you might want to suggest getting some counseling together. That way it won't seem like it's all on him. He has probably not come to terms with his sexuality and is still not ready to broadcast it around. Since he is your partner, be loving and supportive. Give him some time.

My parents and me are not getting along. I am 18 and they say as long as I have to live in their house, it’s their rules. I think I’m an adult so I should have some say so. What do others in my position do?

So let's get this straight. You want all the privileges of adulthood but none of the responsibilities. It's their house, therefore their rules. Don't like it? get a job and get out of their house. Then you can make the rules in your own house.

My kid sister lied to this guy and told him she was 18. she’s only 15 1/2. Should I say anything to this guy?

Absolutely yes. Your sister will be very upset, but that's too bad. She is being ridiculously unfair to this guy, AND she is still just 15 and not ready to handle an adult relationship. You are being a really good sister by protecting her since she is not making good decisions.

My aunt and my mom are twins. My aunt seems to thinks she is my mom, too. She keeps giving me advice on dating. I don’t want to hurt her feelings. I’ve asked my mom to talk to her but my mom says I should do that. I want her to stop. How do I do that?

Listen to your mom. Put on your big girl pants, and deal with it. As long as you are respectful, you should not be worrying about her feelings. Even as your aunt, she should not be giving her opinions on your dating unless you ask for it.

I admit my little sister (15) is nosy and annoying but my bf is really mean to her when she butts into our business. Does he have a right to do that as my bf?

No one has a "right" to be mean to anyone else. The two of you need to sit down with her an explain - politely- that her interference is no appropriate nor appreciated. You might also try talking with your parents about her behavior. All that being said, your bf can express how her behavior makes him feel, but, no, being your bf does not give him any right to put her down or try to discipline her.

I don't think my boyfriend likes my hair color (Brown), should I change it?

Don't change just because your bf MAY not like your hair. If you want to change it for you, that's different. You need to be comfortable with you and how you look.
Liked by: Aremu Hassan Salma

How do I “nicely” tell my gf that she is putting on weight? Other people at school have come up to me and asked if she is okay. It’s that noticeable. I don’t want to hurt her but I don’t want her to hurt herself. Her mom and dad are very overweight.

Unfortunately, she has two role models that present her with an unhealthy picture. Tell her what people are asking and then just ask her how she would like you to handle it. That way the criticism is not coming from you, but she will get the message. What she does with the information is then up to her.
Liked by: Salma

We are fortunate and our family is pretty well off. My kid bro is going with this girl. I think she’s a gold digger and I don’t want to see him get hurt. I know he wouldn’t be happy with me interfering. I want to check her out and get facts to talk to him. I know I shouldn’t get in the middle...

There is nothing wrong with you checking her out. Just be sure you have a reputable person or company looking into her. If you find nothing wrong, keep your mouth shut, but if you find something that could potentially hurt your bro, you need to sit with him and explain that you love him and don't want to see him get hurt. Just make sure you deal with facts, not opinions.


Language: English