Dr. Andrew

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My gf is seeing a therapist. The therapist is telling my gf she should break up with me because I yelled at her once. I've never touched her. We had an argument. WTF?

Obviously, there has to be more to this. No respectable therapist is going to recommend breaking up over someone raising their voice. Suggest to your gf that you BOTH go to see her therapist so you can get to the bottom of this.

I've been out with this guy three times. He's never even tried to hold my hand. I'm not sure what this means, but I really like going out with him. He's a lot of fun.

Just go with the flow. If he keeps taking you out, he's connected. He shouldn't have to be aggressive to show you he cares.

My gf's father is a really famous guy. Her parents take us out. I'm not sure how to handle the crowds. It makes me nervous.

Just be yourself. You don't need to "handle" the crowds. Follow your gf's lead and enjoy yourself.

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When I give my gf a compliment she blows it off. I can't tell if she's fishing for more or what. How do I have this talk with her. It's really getting to the point I don't feel like giving her a compliment because it just gets brushed off.

More than likely, it's low self esteem. I would strongly suggest short term therapy with a highly skilled professional. She didn't get what she needed growing up.

My gf WAS a cutter. Now she's got scars on her arms. I want her to see a dermatologist to see what can be done but she says she's scared. It's to the point she wont go to the beach because of how her arms looks. Ideas?

Just be gentle. She's embarrassed and ashamed. Tell her you'll go with her, and it will just be for a consultation.

My buddy thinks his gf is cheating on him. He wants me to ask her out to see what she says. Is this something I should do because we're like brothers?

Hell, no!! You'll wind up fried by both of them. Do NOT get yourself in the middle.

My gf loves loves loves horses so she usually wears jeans and a work shirt. When she gets dressed up she is like DAMN!!! The problem is other people have said she must be like a lesbian or something. I want to punch them out but I don't know what to do or say.

Just smile. You don't need to say anything. As the saying goes, "Ya can't fix stupid."

My bf just overdosed and is in the hospital. I feel like telling him if he doesn't go to rehab I'm going to break up with him. IDK. Is this too much pressure? I don't want to make the situation worse.

Before you say or do anything else, contact an interventionist. That person will have expertise in exactly how to handle the situation without making it worse.

I worked really hard to get my gf an engagement ring. She doesn't know I got one yet. The other days she says if we get engaged she wants to pick out the ring. I'm not sure how I feel about this. Shouldn't she just be grateful for me getting a ring?

Dude, it's JEWELRY, and she's a woman!! What part don't you get? Do you want to be right or happy? Pick one.

Me and this girl broke up for a month. We agreed it was ok to go out, but she went out with this guy I hate. Now I'm pissed and don't know what to do.

You can't change rules in the middle of the game. Once you broke up and said it was ok to go out, both of you gave up all rights to say with whom!. Get over it if you want to stay with her.

My husband of two years is negative on everything I suggest. His first response is "no." How do I change that? It really upsets me.

Start doing things without asking until he comes around. Sounds like a bit of short term couples' counseling would really help. Don't let it go, or the problem will get worse.

I moved to a big city. All my friends like going out and bar hopping every weekend. I feel like a loser because I don't want to do that all the time. Is that really the only way to meet women in a big city?

No it's not. Don't change yourself to meet the environment. Change your environment to meet your needs. There are plenty of activities that don't involve bar hopping.

My roommate is a lesbian. We get along great. I just started going out with this girl. When she found out about my roommate she freaked. She said there's no way we're not hooking up. I really like this girl so what do I do. My roomie thinks it's really funny.

Your new gal has too many pre-conceived prejudices. That's a look into your future. Introduce them and see if she's able to change her mind. If not, time to move on.

Me and my gf started a diet together to help each other. Our friends say that makes us codependent. Are they right?

No, not at all. As a matter of fact, it's always better to do things with a partner. Good thing your friends have day jobs, because they're not cutting it as psychologists!!

I recently got an inheritance. I didn't tell my gf about it for a few weeks. Now she's all about spending and having a good time. I feel like she's taking advantage of me. How should I handle this?

You got your answer from the universe by her actions. Time to say bye-bye. It's one thing if you want to spend and have a good time. It's your money ... NOT hers.

Our granddaughter is dating a guy we think is great. She wants to bring him over for dinner. The problem is our son and daughter in law. They don't like him and have told us that. It's like we have to make a choice on who to be loyal to. What do we do, please?

That's difficult. Obviously, your gd loves and respects you enough that she wants to introduce you. You're not choosing. You're entertaining. It's not a loyalty issue. Don't put yourselves or let yourselves be put in the middle.

I'm a 29 year old widow. My husband was killed in a car crash last year. I recently started dating this really nice guy. I still have pics of me and my husband all around. My new guy has never said anything. I'm just wondering if I should put all the pics away. IDK what to do.

Don't put things away because of him. Your loss is still very fresh. Only put pics away if and when you are comfortable with it yourself. Give yourself time to heal.

My bf's best friend kissed me at another friend's house. I'm freaked out. I don't know whether or not to tell my bf. What do I do?

Yes, you need to tell him exactly how it went down. He needs to hear you first before it gets to him via the grapevine, which usually gets distorted.

Me and my friend posted some selfies without a whole lot of clothes. My bf said he's breaking up with me. I don't get it. We were just fooling around.

What don't you get? ANYTHING you put in digital format is for the whole world to see. It cheapens you, and he obviously doesn't want any part of it. All choices come with consequences, good and bad.

I'm dating this great lady. She's like way above what I'm used to. I'm intimidated and I don't know what to do. How do I get over this?

You're going to have to accept that she doesn't see it that way, or she wouldn't be dating you to begin with. Dude, you need some self-esteem work. Do yourself a favor and get some professional help.

Me and this girl are getting serious. I said I thought it was a good idea that we know each other's medical history. I don't see what the big deal is but she totally freaked out. Am I missing something?

You're not missing anything. She is. In this day and age, it's actually quite important to educate each other. The wrong combination of genetics can be disastrous.

There's this great guy. The only problem is he's not from my culture. My parents have said if I marry him they'll disown me. I don't want to disrespect them, but I don't know what to do. I really love this guy.

Very difficult situation. Many cultures are VERY rigid when comes to marrying outside of the culture. If they refuse to listen, ultimately, you will have to decide between your man and your family. Get some professional help, please

I really like this girl at school. She says she'll go out with me but I have to accept that she's gender neutral. Could somebody please tell me what the hell that means and what I'm supposed to do with that?

She doesn't want to be id'd as male or female. Best advice is just to agree and then let it play itself out.

My mom is an alcoholic. Me and my gf went out to dinner with her and my gf ordered a glass of wine. My mom totally wigged out and embarrassed us. Now my gf says she won't be around my mom. I don't know how to handle this.

You need to sit down with your mom and explain that she should not put her baggage onto your gf. Your gf is correct in setting a boundary. Your mom needs to apologize.

I'm 22. My dad has been a single parent since my mom died when I was 14. I'm going with this great guy but my dad keeps tabs on me like I'm still 14. What's a good way to handle this?

Your dad feels the ultimate responsibility and obligation to your mom. Just sit with him and have an honest talk about what's going on. Reassure him. That's your best path for both of you.


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